Parents with JW Adult Children Shunning Them - How Are You Coping ?

by flipper 37 Replies latest jw friends

  • flipper
    flipper

    Getting ready to go to work today and won't be back till morning so thought I'd bump this up for any comments about JW adult children shunning their fading or non-witness parents ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Snoozy
    Snoozy

    I know someone that is being shunned because the parents raised her in the JW religion and then dropped out. She is not a JW but still is holding a grudge for them raising her in it and won't speak to them.

    Snoozy...(Not me thank goodness)

  • flipper
    flipper

    SNOOZY- It is totally natural for an adult child to feel bitter and angry at parents for lost opportunities- perhaps no college allowed, or career opportunities, however in time to get happiness it's good when someone can finally let their bitterness go. I hope that person does that you mentioned

  • hopie
    hopie

    I AM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS, AND HOPE IN TIME THERE WILL BE A HAPPY ENDING FOR YOU ALL.

    I FIND, FOR THE MOST PART, UNTIL ONE IS PERSONALLY NEGATIVELY AFFECTED BY THE ELDER ARRANGEMENT, ONE WON'T SEE THROUGH THIS DESTRUCTIVE CULT.

    I, ALONG WITH MY FAMILY RESIGNED IN 1983, THAT IS EXCEPT MY OLDEST DAUGHTER, BECAUSE OF THEIR SHUNNING POLICY, I LOST HER FOR 10 YEARS TO THIS CULT. IN 1993, I DECIDED IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO DO SOMETHING TO GET HER BACK, AND OUT OF THIS CULT. MIND YOU, NOT EVERYONE IS IN POSITION TO DO AS I DID, BUT IT FIT FOR ME. I REJOINED, AND WENT UNDERCOVER, IT TOOK 2 YEARS TO GET HER OUT, AND EXPOSE HER ELDER HUSBAND OF BEING A CHILD MOLESTER. I WAS RAISED AS A JW, MARRIED A JW, AND WAS AN ELDER'S WIFE FOR 15 YEARS, SO, I WAS EQUIPED WITH KNOWING ALL THE( INS) AND (OUTS) OF THIS ORGANIZATION. I WROTE ABOUT MY RESCUE JOURNEY, AND MY BOOK IS ENTITLED: "GOING UNDERCOVER TO RESCUE MY DAUGHTER, FROM THE CULT OF JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES" http://www.amazon.com/Going-Undercover-Rescue-My-Daughter/dp/0941813053

    PEACE, AND HAPPINESS FOR YOU.

    HOPIE

  • trevor
    trevor

    Flipper- Hopie & the others...

    So much pain. Have been there. Thanks for sharing.

    You are brave people. Never under-estimate yourselves.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    I REJOINED, AND WENT UNDERCOVER, IT TOOK 2 YEARS TO GET HER OUT, AND EXPOSE HER ELDER HUSBAND OF BEING A CHILD MOLESTER.

    Wow, Hopie-that is amazing, and must have taken some careful planning!!! Great to hear it.

  • Regretful_J
    Regretful_J

    Hi Flipper, It is very sad to hear stories such as yours. My situation is likely to be a reversed one in the future. My parents brought me up in this cult and they are starting to see that I have little to no interest in it and are trying to shame/guilt me into going to the meetings regularly. When the time comes when i move out and stop going altogether I have a feeling they are going to shun me but at this point i couldn't care less. I admit I have a grudge against them for bringing me up in this cult and preventing me from having a normal life. I might be getting a good job in a couple weeks if one of the interviews i been on materializes into something. Thankfully they let me go to college.

    I also have a bad feeling that they are only going to come to me if they need money, since they are starting to do that now. My brother and his wife will probably shun me as well because they are so indoctrinated into this Bull$h!t that they think the organization can do no wrong. I hope my parents will wake up some day as you have though im not too hopeful on that one.

    The act of disfellowshiping should get more media attention and be outlawed for what it does to people. The organization is very abusive as we can all attest to. I hope your daughters wake up someday and realize what this organization is really about. Take care Friend.

  • nomoreguilt
    nomoreguilt

    As in my past posts, I have related my df'ing and divorce and seubsequent shunning by my sons. My re-instatement settle that issue but not the pain and sorrow of their rejection caused by the CULT. Man made impositions on the consciences of those we love all in the NAME of a god/organization, this Unfaithful and pathetic excuse for a so-called slave of christ. Give me a F'ing break.

    I am now about to be put in the middle of another crisis involving my sons as I have posted a thread on his soon to be shunned expierence. I liked the thought of getting involved again as was succesful for one of dear friends here, but I don't have the stomach to get into the MUCK that is created by the WTBTS, CAPS for emphasis, DISDAIN for their twisted sense of LOYALTY. Oh, yes, they love that word LOYALTY, don't they? PISS ANTS are what they are. When have they ever been loyal to their own members? Those in Malawi thrown under the train for what??? Pennies for a political card, when there was only ONE party in the entire country?? While at the same time telling the branch in Mexico that it was OK for the bros there to BRIBE the govt officials about military service??

    Yes! I am REALLY pissed off today, the shits getting too close to home again. Do NOT rock my boat!!!DAMN I HATE the Witnesses!!!!!!!! Nff said.

    NMG

  • dawg
    dawg

    Mr. Flipper, I love you brother!

    It's so damn hard isn't it? Our loved ones are actually telling us how we must think; I've never told them they must think like me.

    And to make matters worse, what they believe they won't fact check against, and they're mad because you have and proven beyond all doubt that it utter nonsense. So their rules are, believe like me about something I'm wrong about or I'll withdraw my love... its emotional blackmail is what it is.

    When/if you find the answer to this nonsense, then please let me know. You have my sympathy, I live in the same hell as you.

  • Devilsnok
    Devilsnok

    I've been on the otherside of this. I was 15 my mother ditched my dead beat father and ran off and so she was promptly DF'D for adultery. Having been in the truth from when i was a foetus I was well and truely brainwashed and being 15 completly susceptible to what the elders instructed me to do, So I cut her off and didn't speak to her for over 10 years. Looking back I didn't miss her, i didn't think of her it was like she didn't exist. I did what the org asked of me and didn't question it, stupid me.

    Now some 17 years after leaving the truth I have no relationship with my mum, I get one phone call a year and thats about it. I have tried to fix things between us but its like theres nothing there anymore the relationship has just gone. It pisses me off that I don't have her in my life any more especially when i see the kind of relationships my mates have with their mothers but I know it was my fault, that I let a f**king organisation take my mum from me.

    Going slightly off topic...

    I've never ever had a birthday card or anything on my birthday from my mother, even after I left the truth. A couple of years back I had to go visit my mum to deliver a computer system to her that she'd asked me to build her. It happened to be my girlfriends birthday and my mum knew about it, anyway when we got there my mum had brought her a flipping birthday cake!!! And it had candles in it!!! Worldly girlfriend gets a birthday cake and ex dub son gets sod all on his birthday.

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