I'm so down...my birthday is tomorrow and...

by FreedomFrog 27 Replies latest jw friends

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog

    I just had to pay $79. for my stupid license and tags. Happy birthday to me!!!....Yeah right.

    For almost several months I had true peace but today my birthday is really hitting me. I was going to use some of the money to buy myself a nice Ficus for my new apartment or I was going to buy another book I've wanted...but I have no money now. The money I did have I had to give to my kids (which wasn't much) because they wanted to get me a present. So I gave them my last dollar. Don't get me wrong, I'm so glad that my kids think of me and even though "I'm" paying for my own gift and not knowing what it is, I'm a bit down.

    Since I came out of the borg, I haven't had a real party...I haven't had real gifts, I don't even get b-day cards other than one from my 10year old and 3 year old. I feel kinda lonely. I have 2 friends but I've just became better friends with them recently and it's too new for birthday cards or whatever.

    I've got more wrinkles I've just noticed today on my hands...ugh!

    Don't worry, I'll get my peace back but today I just wanna cry. I haven't felt so low for several months so I'm not going to fret about me being in a down mood.

    Just had to vent a bit.

  • Dorktacular
    Dorktacular

    I know... been there, done that. At least the kids think about you, though. It will get better. Happy Birthday, though!

  • yknot
    yknot

    alt

    Well here is my tip....start planning your 40th B-Day now!.......make sure it includes a trip to the spa for 'rejuvenation' treatments that have lasting effects...

  • amama2six
    amama2six

    I still haven't had a proper birthday since getting out of the Cult 12 years ago. I hope that this year will be different but with the way our finances are at the moment it looks like it will be another "Oh yeah, Happy Birthday" year. :/

    *Hugs* and Happy Birthday to you! I hope your day is better than you expect it to be. :)

  • DJK
    DJK

    ((((( Freedomfrog )))))

    Buy the ficus later as a belated present and try to have a happy birthday with your kids.

  • changeling
    changeling

    Happy B-day FF! Be happy, you're only 37!

    changeling :)

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog

    I think the main thing that is affecting me is I'm that much closer to 40 without having a thing to own, or be proud of. Heck, I don't even have my first degree for this birthday. I don't have family now, I live in a very small apartment. and...did I mention I have wrinkles on my hands!!!!!!! I know 37 isn't that old..but this age is really hitting me hard because I'm seeing more signs of aging.

    I'm tired, I have to stay up till 3am on most night completing homework, and get up early for other hectic life things that I'm sure is why my hands are looking more wrinkled today.

    I'll be over this in a week but I'm beginning to hate when my b-day comes around.

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog
    Buy the ficus later as a belated present and try to have a happy birthday with your kids.

    I plan on it, may have to be next month...and I will have a happy birthday with my babies because I'll make sure of it. I'm just having a little melt down right now...I'll get over it by this evening I'm sure.

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog

    Oh, that is so sweet of you John Doe...it's not the gift thing really...it's more of the fact I've just noticed wrinkles on my hands. I belief BB is right though, I believe I'm dehydrated and since I have to stay up so late and get up so early my body is just crying out to slow down. After this Algebra course the college won't be so tough and things can get back to being a bit easier.

    This is my last week in Algebra. I'm a bit nervous because my final is this Sunday. I don't even know if we're timed. I'm hoping not because that will give me plenty of time for each question.

    I guess it hit me I'm turning another year older and don't really have much to show for...though, I AM in college, I do have my beautiful children for the most part and I am finally getting close to two wonderful ladies who I believe will become my best friends in the near future. Things will change...I'm just a tad impatient...lol

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    Since Armegeddon, back in 75, didnt deliver the goods, were all getting older. That wasn't supposed to happen.

    This new heavens and new earth aint all it was cracked up to be.

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