How do you handle ... being shunned?

by Awakened at Gilead 58 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Casper
    Casper

    A@G,

    Looking back on it, don't you think it odd, that our (or their) faith is so weak, that it can't stand up to being around a DF or DA'd person for just a few minutes. Could we have been swayed that easily...??


    I agree, people who have never been JWs, are just blown away at some of the things we tell them we have to endure.

    I know when I have related some things, it sounded "Insane" even to me, and I would think.... how did I ever tolerate such things...

    Cas

  • Awakened at Gilead
    Awakened at Gilead
    I know when I have related some things, it sounded "Insane" even to me, and I would think.... how did I ever tolerate such things...

    It was comical yesterday... The meetup was an ASL practice group. After mentioning that I learned ASL at my former religion, the group asked which religion, so I used the sign for JWs, and some didn't understand the sign. So then a few starting mimicking knocking on doors and making fun, it was great... everyone seemed to dislike JWs... yet before I would have felt that "we must have the truth since they are making fun of us", lol

    And yes, I think most of us tolerated these things, such as shunning others or running away from apostates since this is what we were ordered to do. "Resistance is futile!!!!'

    A@G

  • ibme
    ibme

    Sir,

    Me looks at ALL humans as though they were a cashier at a local retailer.

    We need each other.

    They have a job. They need their job. Me needs their employer product.

    For the most part they are OK.

    However, if for some reason they are not with it, for what ever the reason, me
    let their ill slide.

    Me will not add their ills to my life.

    Me will try my best too leave them in a good frame of mind. (They are only one (1) minute out of twenty-four hours (24)
    in a day of my life). Thus, when me walks out the door me is in peace with myself.

    The same is true with members of the WBTS or any other institution.

    So far, so far, they have a legal right to be what they want.

    Just in the retail business, bad attitude in employees finds them looking for a
    new job.

    My personal opinion is that the bad policy of shunning by WTBS and other
    institutions (which me never has approved) will catch up with them. They will be
    looking for a new job.

    But me will be at peace with myself.

    Me will not add their ills to my life.

    Me’s thinkin’ me’s talkin’ too much.

    Thanks

  • tak
    tak

    A@G,

    First off, congratulations on your decision. The shunning will bug you at first, you will probably be very aware of your surroundings too, looking for the JW's before they see you first and shun you, avoiding them, this is how I dealt with it at first. Sometimes we met just by accident and some shunned me, some didn't. But eventually you will get to the point (and everyone probably arrives at this point faster or sooner than others) where you will no care that those brainwashed people are shunning you, because you are a good person and you deserve to be on this planet just like anyone else does. They have the problem not you.

  • Awakened at Gilead
    Awakened at Gilead
    First off, congratulations on your decision. The shunning will bug you at first, you will probably be very aware of your surroundings too, looking for the JW's before they see you first and shun you, avoiding them, this is how I dealt with it at first.

    Thanks... I'm going through the stages pretty quickly. At this point, though, I'm not avoiding anyone... They'll have to avoid me... I am happy to talk to them. (Now I'm just waiting for one of them streetworking buggers to offer me some mags.... I'll ask them a few pointed questions...)

    A@G

  • dogisgod
    dogisgod

    For those I grew up with and loved I still am very friendly and am glad to see them. They get love from me but they are uncomfortable about it. That's their problem. They were a major part of my life.

  • Dorktacular
    Dorktacular

    I'm glad when most of them shun me, because most of the people who do the shunning weren't worth talking to, anyway. I still talk to a couple decent people who are in, and we don't typically talk about religion, it's just friendly, like friends should be.

    The way I see it is if some ass hat wants to shun me, then that's one less ass hat that I have to deal with that day. And it makes making my Christmas card list a lot easier.

  • nelly136
    nelly136

    after years of pick up and drop when it suited, i dfd them and moved, it was definately one of my better decisions. my nan and aunt i didnt df out of respect for my nan in case i was needed for emergencies, but now i've heard on the grapevine shes been deposited over 200 miles away in one of those jw residential homes i'm thinking that any remaining bonds are released.

  • Thegoodgirl
    Thegoodgirl

    A@G,

    I shun them back! No begging for communication from me. (Unless it is my family. Then I let them know that they are being ridiculous and are truly hurting my feelings, and I would never do that to them. It worked once on my mom, but she keeps changing her mind...)

    But as far as former friends, I like GaryBus' policy: shun them back. I remember he once said "I disfellowship them right back!"

    The Good Girl

  • mary stewart
    mary stewart

    Hello there! I handle it ok. I'm Agnostic, so I'm different with the 'god in flesh' thing.

    Funny thing, one talked to me on the phone asking for my mum. But one of the elders who DFed me wanted a unbaptised non-publisher friend of my mum's not to talk to me, not that I care since she's so harsh to me anyways. She seems to think I should do as I'm told even though I'm 27! This submission crap sucks! I'm rather livid why the dubs love submission and control so much! Didn't Jeus want his followers to be nice and have small jobs to do and no domination of others? They're so ARROGANT! I was so depressed as a dub. And I feel better when my folks aren't around much. I bet they'd die if they knew I'm a Lesbian. HAHA! And the dubs make self-worth and dignity evapourate. I have bad social skills compared to "worldly" people and I can't seem to get a job of a girlfriend. And I just wish i had birthday parties. Still never had one.

    Sorry if I'm ranting. I just need to get it out. I feel so much better now.

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