WOW !!! I feel like you just described me !!!
I'm terrible at friendships!
by GoddessRachel 35 Replies latest jw friends
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White Dove
I e-mail or visit in person. I never talk on the phone because I can't. If I need to make a phone call, my daughter does it for me. I'm also a lousy letter writer because I view it as yet another essay to work on on top of my pile of essays for homework. Now, I hate letter writing. I don't have a printer at home, either. Hopefully that will change in the fall. I need to write to my grandmother. She always writes to me but doesn't have a computer and never will. I need to write to her using the school's computer so it will be fast and good. I don't like to write crap to my loved ones. Long hand writing is not my favorite way to write to a person.
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SnakesInTheTower
IP_SEC:
Somebody analyze me please lol.
No analysis needed...that's just life....
See the following article from the Wall Street Journal I posted here on JWD a copy of back in October
ARTICLE: Making friends isnt so hard-its getting rid of them that's tough
I think that some people are genuinely our friends at the time and stage of our life we are at. When we physically move away, change jobs, change schools, change religions (leave religions ), then those friends fade (ironically) from our life...some we want to see go away...others we miss.
I will miss many of my JW friends ...and a few stay in touch anyway.... even check in with me every few months via phone.... I wonder if that would continue if I were DFd? heh heh
Snakes ()
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LouBelle
Trying to make new friends especially after one has left the organisation is difficult.
I love having friends, but alas I don't have very many deep friendships because while I was in I was only friends with JWs, but they are building up slowly.
I also like a good book but sometimes you've just got to put yourself out there. Usually be surprised that you have a good time.
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lonelysheep
Me, too. I have a few friends who I knew since I was a child, who have remained in my life even when I distanced myself because of the cult. I'm very fortunate. They are like family now, more of a sisterhood bond. That is due to their determination to just live rather than live for religion (they have always been weary of wits).
Now, though, due to work, school and family, I don't have much time to make myself physically present but I try. Those quality times count and strengthen our glue to each other. It helps to invite people over. They show up!
The phone is what I have a problem with. I don't call anybody and have to force myself to live out my desires to hear their voices. Electronic communication for me is only satisfying to a point.
Time ticks away regardless.
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Quirky1
I'm bad it also. Basically because I'm part of a loner and pretty much keep to myself and very seldom rely on anyone else. Yet, I have had many good freinds over the years and when I do see them we reminisce. (hope I spelled that right)
Currently the only freinds I have is family and work mates. Nothing outside the circle.
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Twitch
Being around people for long periods of time drains me in most cases and I've had problems finding people similar to me. I'm a good listener, so I tend to be a magnet for 'troubled souls' and energy vampires, so I have to watch that as well.
Ditto BTW, the best friends I have don't require constant attention. Whenever we connect, it's all good. I tend to shy away from ones who make a point of telling me what I'm missing, how I should be or what I should do, etc.
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GoddessRachel
It helps to invite people over. They show up!
Good idea, Lonely Sheep, it's like "if you build it, they will come"! And I know it's true! I need to invite my friends over!
Time ticks away regardless.
How true!
This thread has been really inspiring to me, if only to point out and then reinforce how we are all in this together and we all struggle with many similar feelings and obstacles!
Twitch, I like your point very much. My real friends that I have made since moving and starting my life over have been really wonderful. We may lose touch for a month, but when we get together for coffee or dinner, we just pick up easily where we left off, no guilt trips! Just understanding of how life is busy!
I'm leary of people I meet who give me a genuinely hard time for not calling them often enough, i.e. are actually offended!
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ninja
I'll be your friend....just don't call me...and I won't call you....k?
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GoddessRachel
I'll be your friend....just don't call me...and I won't call you....k?
Sounds perfect to me!