Ok, I understand some of your "points" but let me break some things down for you.
1. I'm sorry you've had some "bad experiences" in "the world"
2. I'm sorry you've had an alcoholic husband, and also one that was too "into himself"
3. When raising kids, you don't need to threaten them with being destroyed by some unloving Jehooba, YOU teach them values, by living life in a manner in which you see fit. YOU go over what you expect from them. Having faith only works to re-enforce this.
4. I saw MANY young JW's get heavy into drugs, and having unwanted babies, so its on both sides of the fence
5. Do you want your kids around all those molesters that the Borg protects? I know I want NO PART of that. There are sickos on BOTH sides of the fence. But the ones "in the world" get thrown in prison, not protected by a CULT.
Personally, and you can disagree with me all you want, BUT, there are "warning signs" in relationships, and there are good people IN and OUT of the "TROOF". If you haven't found the good people outside of the Borg then you are NOT trying hard enough. I have a small group of great friends, and we all have pretty much the same morals, and values. I was born into the cult, and by MY OWN KNOWLEDGE and MY OWN CHOICES, managed to never do drugs, or have many partners, or STDs. I was raised by a loving parent, and I paid alot of attention to the outside world. I didn't have lots of strict supervision at home, so I was allowed to make my own choices on friends, music, and the like. i also went to college, and LOVED IT.
I knew the RISKS of doing drugs, and engaging in unprotected relations. So I never did either. I was then FORCED to get married to a dub at 18, she was a complete loser, and she was both verbally and physically abusive to me, and oh BTW, she also cheated on me for a long time... So there is good and bad on BOTH sides of the fence.
I mentally checked out of the Borg at about 16 or so, and came back for a while at 21, then checked out mentally and physically at 25. All the while, I was making friends IN and OUT of the Borg. Using MY JUDGEMENT of good and bad people. I can honestly say I have MANY honest, good, caring friends, that would do anything for me. I also have a wonderful woman in my life that I love very deeply, and she is everything I ever dreamed of in a woman.
NOW, my witness family on the other hand shuns me, and won't speak to me or meet my girlfriend. They constantly are thinking about Armageddon and being destroyed. They don't have a whole lot of fun, and their lives are for the most part pathetic. They work, they go to meetings, and that's it. Some try to live a little like "worldly people" but they always fail, or get held back by their brainwashed Dub tendencies.
Its really very simple, life that is. You as an adult have choices to make. You put yourself in certain situations, and then try to make the best of those situations by making GOOD choices. Your life to me, from what I've read on here, you need to make better choices. If someone is a creep, a druggie, an alcoholic, etc., you GET THEM OUT OF YOUR LIFE!!! If you find you are seeing TOO MANY of these people, CHANGE WHERE YOU HANG OUT!!! Really its not hard. I mean if you hang out in a seedy neighborhood bar (pub), then you probably won't meet the best people. Maybe ask co-workers out for drinks? Join a social club? Join a church? Etc. DO SOMETHING!!! There is an old saying that I heard in marketing class, and it applies here:
"NOTHING HAPPENS UNTIL SOMEONE SELLS SOMETHING"
Basically your life will ALWAYS be terrible if you sit around and dwell on all the bad, and don't do anything to make it any better. You're forgetting about some of the badness that goes along with being a Dub. Remember all the meetings? Service? Mind-Control? Weird, looney people? Assemblies? The constant cry for MORE MONEY?? How bout constantly living a life in fear of Armageddon?