Family is driving me nuts... Elder driving me nuts - My 1st rant...

by cognac 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • cognac
    cognac

    So, my family won't leave me alone about my PTSD.

    My sister calls me at my work cause she wants me to go to some natural reflexology place or something yesturday.

    My mother calls me twice last night. I call her back today. Blah, blah, blah something about I might have a thyroid problem, get a second opinion, get a physical...

    Then she said, "you know Cognac, most people are going to die at Armagheddon..." (She brought that up cause I had a talk with them stating I don't believe billions of people are going to die at the big A.) I told her that I felt that way since I was 6 and it's nothing new. I told her I just felt comfortable saying it now because of the new light that was brought out in the April mags. I told her that it seems to me that her and Dad are behind on the new light and they should read those mags.

    She asked me when I usually take my meds. I said at the meetings. She quickly changed the subject and said she she's going to do more research on my meds and my dr...

    I only take the meds when I need it. Today was the 1st day I had to take it at work...

    Next time they call I think I'll have hubby answer it and just say I can no longer talk about it. It's stressing me out...

    Anyways, last night I ran into 1 of the elders at my hall who asks me if I'm inviting other people in service. (I typically work with my hubby so that we can go out to breakfast or whatever and don't go out.) I was on the phone. So, he see's I'm on the phone, and just says, "oh, nevermind, I'll just ask your husband."

    My husband hears him talking to me cause we were right in front of my house, now he's stressed out because this elder is a pain in the a**...

    Arrrr, thanks for listenning to my rant...

    PS. Sorry if this topic is everywhere. I'm just irritated and can't think straight...

  • potleg
    potleg

    Try not to get sucked down into their vacuous vortex of drivel. Imagine... If they collar you maybe give them a vacant look and slowly, at just the right moment say something off the wall like...there's a lot of wether in Africa...followed up by...I have to go now and rub lard on the cat's boil.

    Just thinking about this stuff makes me laugh. Imagine the elders expression.

    Maybe you and Mr. Hubby can brainstorm other ridiculous replies...Laughter really is the best medicine, especially after 3 or 4 Jack and Cokes.

  • cognac
    cognac

    Just thinking about this stuff makes me laugh. Imagine the elders expression.

    Maybe you and Mr. Hubby can brainstorm other ridiculous replies...

    lol, not a bad idea. Maybe if they think I'm totally crazy, they will just leave me alone... lol

    Laughter really is the best medicine, especially after 3 or 4 Jack and Cokes.

    Yeah, I wish. Not supposed to drink with the meds...

  • blondie
    blondie

    "Thanks for asking, my husband and I are doing what we need to do."

    I would stop sharing personal details with my family except for your husband. It will come back to bite you. Just say you have discussed it with your doctor and husband, the 2 people who need to know. I think she is invading your personal boundaries and it is time to stop it in a polite way.

    Just my opinion, Love, Blondie

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    I agree with Blondie, get those boundries up and don't say anything more. Listen or half listen to suggestions and then politely ignore them.

  • cognac
    cognac

    Thanks Blondie. I think your right...

    She wonders why I am difficult to get a hold of, everytime she talks to me it's 1,000 questions.

    They just don't like that I don't believe what they believe. I had to tell them, just a couple of things I don't believe for my own healing...

    Now, I think it's time to cut them off from this subject because they are stressing me out... They get so offended when I don't tell them things. They get insulted. I have a difficult time telling them I will deal with something and to let me deal with it because I get the, "why don't you want my help" "why are you pushing me away" and 50 questions like that and then it filters to the rest of my family and I get "we are just trying to help" "this is what your problem is, you don't let anyone help you"... They just make me feel even worse then if I just tell them what they want to know...

    They just say I'm too proud and crap when I just don't want them stressing me out...

  • MissingLink
    MissingLink

    Was the elder accusing you of skipping service - just the two of you. I mean - I know you ARE, but was he making a point of it? Why else would he ask that?

  • cognac
    cognac
    Was the elder accusing you of skipping service - just the two of you. I mean - I know you ARE, but was he making a point of it? Why else would he ask that?

    No, I don't think so...

    I used to do evening witnessing all the time. Mon, Wed, and Thur (went to the sat morning bookstudy) and Fri. There was never any groups for that and I was constantly asking people to go out with me. I got fed up and stopped asking, it was just to much work for me just for them not to show up...

    He's putting pressure on me to ask others to go out with me during the evening. It's like, he never asks us to go out with him. The elders are probably starting to talk about evening witnessing now that spring is coming and he probably wants us to do all the work... I just can't stand the pressure especially when they don't even ask me how I'm doing...

  • momzcrazy
    momzcrazy

    I learned the hard way to keep family stuff within the family, meaning the 5 people who live in my house. Just tell everyone to back off, they are causing you more stress. Tell your mom that you will only listen to medical advice from a medical professional.

    My inlaws have had their noses in our marriage from day one. While I was in NYC my MIL grilled my 12 yr old about me. When I came home I found out that I was on crack, a wiccan and that my kids should call DHA. That last bit was from a school friend. Oh and I forgot alcoholic. I once again had to tell my husband that either he tells them to butt out, or I will. Nothing I do is any of their business. We also had a talk with our girls about blabbing.

    I really suggest the book "Boundaries" by Dr Henry Cloud and Dr John Townsend. WONDERFUL BOOK!

    momz

  • R.Crusoe
    R.Crusoe

    Classic case of JWs plus Psychologist versus you and maybe they should both go see each other and leave you out of their game?

    But remember they both involve your family as players in their game to bowl you a low ball!

    So maybe go swing with your husband and play games you both enjoy and hit a few boundaries together?

    Eventually they will go play someone else through all the waiting around.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit