What have you done to heal yourselves from the borg & lead a content life?

by cognac 41 Replies latest jw friends

  • Robert7
    Robert7

    For me it was relatively simple since I was inadvertently fading for a while and have minimal ties in the Borg:

    1) HAD to get to some level of agreement with my wife. At first it was affecting our relationship very badly, but as we worked it thru (and she learned the truth herself but for now stays in due to friends) we at least can meet in the middle and have a good relationship.

    2) Visiting this site really helped me disconnect from the WTS mindset, and it was very necessary especially in the beginning. Now I have this paradox, because I want to forget about it all, and just move on, which means I need to visit JWD less often (just so I can mentally move on). However, I keep getting drawn to JWD daily. Could be worse :)

    3) Get better relationships with non-Witness friends (hate the term 'worldly').

    Otherwise, I've pretty much moved on... but I still think about it all almost daily, which I guess why I'm still visiting JWD regularly. It's not THAT easy to disconnect.

  • cognac
    cognac

    I'm now hijacking my own thread...

    PS. Since my mom found out I have PSTD - she told my sister and now they are both doing research on it, and evidently I'm there new "project"... Now, my sister wants me to go do some natural healing crap with her, lol... She called me today (she never calls me) to talk about it... For some reason, I find this very funny...

    I should somehow take advantage of this, the idea that they think I'm crazy, lol

  • oompa
    oompa

    Not done too well on the healing, content life, and moving on.......what "PTSD meds" are you taking?.........you may need to send some my way........................oompa

    often bitter and loney....where are the hookers?

  • R.Crusoe
    R.Crusoe

    Oompa -min a room with lush surroundings - all else was hopeless! Time and affection and someone who simply knows!

    Maybe about 4yrs since - not sure when but I'm now over stuff that has me worried about meeting a woman and being worried when were alone as if I have a duty to perform and do well!

    If it takes weeks or longer then so be it and if it never happens then that's cool as well. If she likes me that's all I want and if not then it wasn't for me anyhow!

    I'm now much more in the space of no woman no cry even though its unhappy but I tend not to feel inhibited and just let things go as they will when out in a bar! And so far they haven't lol! So no change there! Time may alter things or it may not and either way nature chooses!

    Just make sure your not alone when it does lol!

  • cognac
    cognac

    Not done too well on the healing, content life, and moving on.......what "PTSD meds" are you taking?.........you may need to send some my way........................oompa

    often bitter and loney....where are the hookers?

    I take "Gabapentin" - 300 mg 3 times a day. Often, I don't take it 3 times a day because you don't have to. Also, I take Adderall for my ADD. I take about 20mg of that as needed. I actually think Adderall works for much more then ADD. I notice that my mind is a lot more at ease. Also, so much of things are that I met my husband 1/2 way on things. I go to all of the meetings as long as he listens to how I feel and sees the Physiatrist with me. I don't do everything my own way whether or not I feel I'm right. I comment where I don't feel guilty, meet the field service group (then we go out to breakfast, lol) and his walls have come a lot. He backs me up - even when I got into an argument with my mom about it. He listened to my apostate friend and I regarding the truth about the truth. I just try not to stuff things down his throat. But, for the most part, I can talk to him pretty freely... Oompa, I hope I'm not getting to personal, if so, I'm really sorry. But, can you talk about this stuff with your wife? If not, have you thought or tried seeing a therapist with her? Oompa, you seem like a really great person. Don't want to see you lonely or bitter. Please, let us know if we can help in any way... PS. No, no hookers for you, lol...

  • cognac
    cognac

    Casper -

    Thanks and good for you for going to a therapist!

    HAD to get to some level of agreement with my wife. At first it was affecting our relationship very badly, but as we worked it thru (and she learned the truth herself but for now stays in due to friends) we at least can meet in the middle and have a good relationship.

    Robert - Yup, that was a bit one for me. Hubby and I got into some massive fights over it... Nice to be on middle ground, huh?

  • Robert7
    Robert7

    Cognac - achieving a middle ground is SO important, since leaving the faith can break up marriages. I was at a point in January where I was all but convinced that it was over, but fortunately things turned around.

  • Alpaca
    Alpaca

    Meditation >>> I caught a ration of shit for doing this while I was in the Borg even though it helped relieve chronic pain from a car accident (Borg thinking: heavy duty pain killers okay; meditation demonic) >>> now I do it all the time

    School >>> the academic atmosphere and intelligent exchange is very healing

    Take time for myself >>> instead of constantly running on the Borg treadmill

    Exercise and working out >>> it's not beneficial for just a little, lots of it has made me feel terrific

    Volunteered for worthy causes >>> 'cause God ain't gonna fix things--it's up to us

    Practicing intellectual honesty >>> professing to believe Borg propaganda was very debilitating

    Evaluating people, ideas, and philosophies of life based on their real merit rather than some bogus man-made standard masquerading as God's standard

    There's lots more, but I think these are the biggies.

  • mamochan13
    mamochan13

    "Didn't you know University's are the Devil's workshop???" Yep. And now I know why JWs are not allowed to attend - the Devil uses education to turn people into apostates. :)

  • oompa
    oompa
    cognac: But, can you talk about this stuff with your wife? If not, have you thought or tried seeing a therapist with her?

    Not really, I tried for a year and it was the only time we have ever fought....screaming, tears, etc. (her). Now I try once in awhile, but still does NOT go over well....she is diehard JW and can't imagine it is not all true....anything possible wrong will be fixed in Gods due time..blah, blah, blah.

    Ah the therapist....great guy...thinks dubs are a cult, so when wife came with me, I mentioned matter of factly to him my wife there thinks if you are not a JW you and everyone else in the world is going to soon be destroyed at armageddon....man did it sound weird....my wife was speechless....a bit later I told him I was very worried about our marriage and felt we needed counseling...he agreed...she did not. BTW, I am off all of the 5 to 10 drugs I have been on the last two or three years except for Lithium, and hey that is just a salt...cant tell it is doing anything, but it feels good to be almost totally clean..............oompa.....I was NOT CRAZY!!!!

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