Courting couples in the JW having sex together before marriage?

by chikikie 36 Replies latest social relationships

• 

  Finally-Free

  I was sexually active before I joined the JWs, but didn't have sex afterword until 2 days after my wedding. We were both just too tired on the wedding night. We had sex occasionally over the next 5 years, but we just weren't compatible. She wasn't interested in anything other than the missionary position, which, for a few years, was impossible for me because of injuries and surgery on both of my knees and the accompanying pain. She was very happy to be "serviced" in other ways by me, but was unwilling to reciprocate. By the time we split up our marriage had been sexless (for me) for 11 years.

  Sex is a very important part of a marriage. Anything beyond that could be done with a roommate or hired help. A divorce is very painful and very expensive. The whole idea of people making such an important and costly committment to each other without taking each other for a test drive is idiotic.

  W
• 

  ex-nj-jw

  The whole idea of people making such an important and costly committment to each other without taking each other for a test drive is idiotic.

  nj
• 

  Gopher

  One JW couple I knew in this city eventually went to the Gilead missionary school. On their wedding night (over 15 years ago now) before the elder conducting the wedding said "you may kiss the bride", he told the audience this was the first time these two had ever kissed. I am not kidding.
• 

  chikikie

  Yikes FF, I can imagine what that is like for to do all the giving and recieving nada, you must have been so frustrated! There are so many positions (many many many) that you both could have really enjoyed so that your knees were fine.

  The problem is that because its such a taboo subject, its stops young virgin sisters asking about sex, if only mothers educated or perhaps they dont know either, My 12 year old daughter asked me what BJ was the other day as she had heard aound her peers at school, I told in a very clinical way, she knew what a Penis was because she had had sex ed, and that was that, she chuckled and then said, errrr yuck disgusting. Im never doing that. I said ok then, dont hesitate to ask mummy if you want to know anything else. lol
• 

  Leolaia

  There was once a time when some couples lived together openly, as the Watchtower had to admit:

  *** w35 3/1 pp. 76-77 Questions ***

  Looseness of morals is also quite noticeable. The thought has been prevalent amongst some that it is unnecessary for Jehovah's witnesses to go through the form of marriage prescribed by the State, and some have lived as man and wife without subscribing to the legal requirements, claiming their authority for so doing to be the article on marriage in the Home and Happiness booklet. When one of Jehovah's witnesses considers marriage, should he not meet the legal requirements, as long as they do not conflict with God's law?
• 

  ex-nj-jw

  said ok then, dont hesitate to ask mummy if you want to know anything else

  Chikie that's what I'm talking about! Be honest, use terms they are familiar with and age appropriate and most of all don't make a big deal out of it so they will feel comfortable talking to you in the future!

  I have 3 boys (25, 20 and 17) and we've had that type of relationship since they were little. Now that they are older they sometimes tell me things I really don't want to know but I try to compose myself and listen anyway and give advise as needed!

  nj
• 

  chikikie

  Its important that our children confide in us and that we give as honest an answer as their age can cope with! If only the witness mothers would have helped their daughters, maybe some did, but that wont explain why there are so many women out there repressed and feel that sexual matters are dirty and wrong, there are many types of loving and in a close relationship like marriage it should feel nature to explore these things, i do agree that sex is important in a long term relationship/ marriage, and is one of the reason why so many relationships fail, as they say the first thing that goes when the love has gone is the sex.

  I supppose we have gone off the subject here. I think i am satified now that there are many couples within the JWs that have fornicated before marriage to each other and thathave never confessed those sins yet condemn those who have and confessed their sins. God help them