I sat down to watch some TV today... Our TV only pick up 3 channels.
And stuff worth watching is few and far between. It's amazing how much mindless drivel is being broadcasted.
Deal or no Deal: Where an overactive lunatic runs around the stage hyperventilating, while simultaniously showing off his/her amazing random-number-generator skills by choosing completely arbitrary numbers and winning money for it.
Every single contestant is "Positive" that it's case contains the 1 out of 26 cases that contains a million dollars.
They show off their arrogance by claiming that god put them on this show for a reason. (Which indicates that god ignored everyone else in America.)
They show off their greed by turning down hundreds of thousands of dollars for a 50/50 chance at getting more.
And then choosing 'lucky' numbers until they finally walk away with a random amount of money between $0.01 and $1,000,000.00.
A monkey with numbered flashcards, would have an equal chance of winning.
The Biggest Loser: While it's not based entirely on random numbers. It's still completely mindless. As you watch dozens of really fat people sweat, cry and weigh themselves week after week and stab each other in the back at the voting table, until the end of the season when you are watching about a half a dozen really fit people sweat, cry and weigh themselves and stab each other in the back at the voting table.
In the end somebody wins a bunch of money because they lost a bunch of weight.
This is nice for the contestants, but why would anyone at home watch this? You get to sit on YOUR lazy butt while somebody ELSE exercises. There is no intellectual or physical benefit to this at all.
The Local News: Okay, this is the best yet, but MY local news really SUCKS. They tell you which local school has the best athletes... I really couldn't care less WHO is more capable of throwing a ball through a hoop. What does sports have to do with news? News is supposed to be about important events, not a buch of sweaty guys playing baseball or jumprope or whatever.
They tell you the predicted weather. But it takes them a half hour to get to MY local weather, because they have to cover a large area... I could simply log onto to weather.com, type in my zipcode and get even MORE detailed information in mere seconds. And if there was a weather emergency, they'd interrupt one of the other mindless shows to tell me.
They tell you who killed who, and who's getting married in my area. But I don't know any of these people, and if I DID know them, they'd tell me themselves. So everyone who cares, already knows this!
The World News: NOW we're getting somewhere! But again, anything they are going to tell me is already covered on wikipedia's main page in much more detail.
Infomercials: I can't STAND infomercials! Who the heck would sit there for an hour and listen to that guy yell at the top of his lungs about ? And watch as the unnattractive assistant shows you every single possible use for it. And then explains what it does, as if it's something special, when in fact EVERY does the exact same thing."This frying pan transfers the heat directly to the food, but the handle stays cool enough to touch." (That's what all frying pans do, you moron.)
"This knife can cut tomatoes, radishes, bone, steak, marshmellows and MORE" (Congratulations, you just defined the word 'knife'.)
"The handymans ultra-mega-utility-belt 4004 can hold hammers, cell phones, nails, screws, even tape!" (It's a pocket, it holds anything smaller than the opening.)
Cheaters: Somebody with an archaic sense of sexual morality hires a private detective to spy on his/her useless wife/husband and see if it's having sex with somebody other than it's legal mate. They film it, and in an astounding display of censorship, they blur out everyones faces and genitalia, bleep out every other word, break apart the physical combat, and then the everybody hates each other.
It's good for a laugh, but completely mind-numbing.
Sports: Constantly on. Constantly mindless. I fail to see the fascination in watching a buch of people play ball... I just don't get it.
Eye for an Eye: Two subhumans take their petty squabbles to a pseudo-judge who tells them why they are so pathetic, and then inflicts an arbitrary penalty on one of the two,or possibly both. It takes us back thousands of years in justice to a time when nobody actually benefited from the legal system, and inflicting revenge was the sole purpose of a judge.
Needless to say, I didn't watch TV very long. Back to the internet!