Upset my JW wife again......

by freedomfighter 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • dawg
    dawg

    All I have to offer is this, and knowing the JWs like I do I doubt it'll do little to help. But ask her what she thinks the definatoin of apostacy is? If she thinks its talking about those who question the FADS of the so called organization, then correct her, show her 1 Thess.. where it says to make sure of all things... if the FADS are telling their followers not to do that (make sure) then they are going against what the BIble teaches. that makes the FADS the "apostates", as they are going against what they claim to believe (the bible)... I hope that helps, it helped my cousin see the light.

    If you can get her to agree, that going against 1 Thess is going against the bible, she then may be willing to read what you've found, she may open her eyes.

  • looloo
    looloo

    tell her the word apostate is used by political partys and a lot of religions but mainly cults and sects according to a dictionary objective description of the word , that says a lot !!!!! but show her you are still a loving husband to her despite being a wicked apostate !!! good luck

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I want to say what you said, but I know the wife isn't ready and would just shut down
    during the "proof."

  • BabaYaga
    BabaYaga

    Excellent point, Dawg.

    ~~~
    quote: "But ask her what she thinks the definatoin of apostacy is? If she thinks its talking about those who question the FADS of the so called organization, then correct her, show her 1 Thess.. where it says to make sure of all things... if the FADS are telling their followers not to do that (make sure) then they are going against what the BIble teaches. that makes the FADS the "apostates", as they are going against what they claim to believe (the bible)."

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    How about trying a more subtle approach? Find some of the threads on here where husbands have gotten their wives out. They were patient, kind, and slooooooowly began to broach subjects, asking subtle questions.

    Your poor wife is feeling like all the security she knows is being yanked out from under her. I would have felt the same way a few short years ago. Really, she is being loyal. Isn't that one quality you used to value in her?

    This takes time. Love must be shown.

  • outofthebox
    outofthebox

    The cult is starting to upset my family relationships also. I feel your pain.

    -ootb

  • yumbby
    yumbby

    I think you are really brave for the way you handled that. I hope she can understand how much you care about her, wanting to save her from the org, maybe someday she will appreciate it.

  • bud2114
    bud2114

    Freedom, I am in exactly the same boat. My wife and I were both raised in the "truth" and we have been married 17 years. I served as an elder for several years until resigning 2 years ago due to the hypocrisy and other crap that I observed on the "inside" and what was coming out of Brooklyn. Suddenly having all this time on my hands that I never had before, something told me to start investigating. Needless to say, it didn't take long for my suspicions to be confirmed that the organization was nothing more than a diabolical cult.

    I have tried several approaches with the wife, both subtle and not so subtle to get her to see things as they really are, but nothing really has worked so far. She refuses to read anything other than the WT publications, or to view anything about the org. on the internet for fear she might stumble on something apostate. I have tried to reason with her using just the bible and she just wont accept it. After all, she says, how can I know more than the faithful slave about the scriptures.

    The only scripture that she will admit to agreeing to is Luke 21:8 where Jesus issued a warning about any person or group claiming to represent him that is proclaiming "... the end is near...", He said "...do not go after them." Although she is unable to refute the fact that of all religions on earth today this scripture most fully applies to Jehovah's Witnesses, it still is not enough for her and she plans to "wait on Jehovah" for better understanding. To make matters worse for us lately, my wifes mother a life-long witness of 70+ years, recently passed. Her father is a long time elder and her sister is regular pioneer married to an elder. They have two children - also pioneers. Now more than ever the family is determined to stay in the "truth" and remain faithful until death like the mother, or until the new system. I love this family, and we all get along great, but they are on to the fact that I no longer hold the organization up like in the past, so I'm sort of the rogue.

    Interestingly, I have shared some of what I have learned about the org. to my fleshly brother and several active "brothers" and while I tell it is hard for them to accept certain things, they don't refuse to believe it. It's a different story with my mother and sister, both lifelong witnesses and other active "sisters" that I have spoken to who refuse to believe that anything is amiss with the org. I just get the "get behind me Satan" look.

    Part of the problem I think (and this may sound sexist I know) is that in general, women are more gullable than men and they tend to view things on a less logical level when it comes to the "truth". The apostle Paul confirmed this when he wrote to Timothy "... Adam was not deceived, but the woman was thoroughly deceived and came to be in transgression." (1 Tim 2:14) This no doubt explains why women greatly outnumber men in this organization. That being said, I know there are lots of women out here who have broken free from the "cult" and I would say they are as vocal or even more so than the men and I appreciate their viewpoints.

    Anyway, I plan to keep working on my wife, trying different appoaches, pointing out the blatant lies and misconceptions in the mags and publications as they come out all while subtly showing her that this org. is not the "be all" "end all" that she thinks. There is another way of life. Hopefully, something will register and we can get on with our lives free from this mess.

  • 4mylove
    4mylove

    So sorry to hear this. I hope she opens up her heart, ears, and eyes. There is always hope....

    4

  • moshe
    moshe

    I had a similar response- my wife just did not trust my judgment and I found out in short order that I was the head of my house for only as long as the elders said I could be. When I tried to explain to her why I would not be carrying a "no blood" card she used the apostate word on me. I think she filed for divorce about a year later. Sorry, mate for your pain- I hope she comes around and listens to you.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit