Unexplained Mormon "miracles"...Unexplained JW "miracles"

by FormerMormon 39 Replies latest jw friends

  • Amber Rose
    Amber Rose

    I am envious of Mormons for this very reason. The Mormon religion is so much more imaginative and colorful than the JW, thier origins, thier rituals, their great journey across America, baptisim pools, everything! Mormon's seem to revel in their off beat teachings whereas JWs hide from theirs and instead, revel in their unremarkableness, lack of creativity, and blandness. Someone described them as Vanilla. Vanilla is flavor and a pleasant one. If JW's had a taste, I would say it was typing paper.

  • oompa

    I think the biggest Morman miracle is if Donny did somehow not do Marie!!!!!............oompa she is still hot.

  • Quandry

    If JW's had a taste, I would say it was typing paper.

    Amber Rose, that is hilarious!!!! And so true. At least Mormons will let their followers know their own history, but JWs will disfellowship you for researching and finding out about their own founder and what his beliefs were!!!!!!!

    On a side note, though, I would have to say that measuring a pyramid and saying that the number of steps led to the year of Jesus' return, and that it was "God's silent witness in stone" is pretty colorful.

    It seems "booze Rutherford" had some pretty whacko ideas, too. Too bad most witnesses are oblivious to them. The ones like the house in California for the "ancient worthies" that would resurrected to live in. Oh, yes, the cadillacs they could be chauffered around San Diego in, also.

  • besty

    Ouija Board Story

    Bible Study (I know this family up in Scotland so have heard this 1st hand)was coming along in the late '60's and was counselled to get rid of their OB.

    So that night they got it down from on top of a wardrobe in an upstairs room and threw it in the bin.

    Imagine their surprise when it was right back on top of the wardrobe next time they looked....

    Dang demunz.

    (Never did hear how they finally got rid of it - perhaps burnt it, in which case there would be a blue flame involved)

  • FormerMormon


    There was the one about the Witness woman at a door by herself. A man came to the door, but sent her away saying he wasn't interested. Later, it was found that this man was a murderer. When asked why he didn't try to kill this woman, he said that it was because of the two big men she had with her, one on each side.

    Of course, it was explained that these "men" were angels that lead the preaching work. Of course, they protected her.

    --Hate to tell you, but that's a MORMON STORY. The two guys standing behind "The Elders" were in fact three guys. --Specifically, they are three nephite apostles of Christs day who were promised they wouldn't die until the second coming. John the beloved is still alive too!!!

    It would be interesting to see how many other MORMON stories you guys pilferred from us. LOL. How bout the one where a gang removes the car battery from some elder's car. The elders get chased there, get in and start the car. The gang freaks and watches as the elders drive away. The car dies when it get them out of danger then the elders see the missing battery. (I think this happened in at least 58 of our missions.)

    Mormon hierarchy does not like people poking around unapproved sources of church history. The church publishes a comprehensive 7 volume set of church history. It is VERY sanitized. Footnotes/source materials are not cited in the work. Often when you do find the original source, ellipses are not used for discontinuous quotes. Words and sentences are heavily changed and sanitized. Leadership doesn't mind looking at church history, as long as it is their sanitized version. The church has had problems retaining official church historians and church history professors (Arrington, Quinn amongst many others) Joseph's Myth and Breed'em Young had problems keeping personal secretaries. Two secretaries that I am aware of died under mysterious circumstances.

    DT... two good ex lds sites ... exmormon.org (not .com--.com is run by Ed Decker..ex lds but a certified over the board nut case)-- another great site I prefer is postmormon.org.

  • steve2

    • The astonishing speed with which humans fall for these strange-but-true stories can be summed up in one word: Gullibility.
    • Every single religious group has its own crop of miracle stories and every single religious group doubts other religious groups' miracle stories.
  • Burger Time
    Burger Time

    Well there was this one time I was wearing my protective underpants when.......

  • FormerMormon

    Burger Time...

    Well there was this one time I was wearing my protective underpants when....... Ha...imposter. Any "true" mormon who has received his/her "Jesus Jammies" knows that they only "work" when you are wearing both garments. (Unless you bought the one piece). The underpants alone wont work, silly. It's kind of like the Wonder Twins "Wonder twins activate... form of godly armor". Cruelly enough, garments used to extend all the way to the ankles and wrists. There's fewer things more dissappointing than seeing your hotwife strip...to her garments. Talk about cold water.

  • logic

    I like the story about the bread . I guess it is okay to keep the found bread but not a lot of money. What if going to an assembly you needed a lot of money because the expense is bankrupting you and a bag of money fell out of a truck would it be o.k. to use it. ??

    Those stories are made up because they are not logical.

    This is a true story, the people are friends of mine.. Their little boy fell out of a 2nd story window but only received minor injuries, she attributed to an angel looking after him. She is a jw. That floored me , where do they get this from. It is like they ignore the scripture that says 'time and chance befall us all'

    I think alot of jws or any one else for that matter , have the audacity to feel they are so special as to have an angel looking after them and not the rest of us.

  • steve2
    I think alot of jws or any one else for that matter , have the audacity to feel they are so special as to have an angel looking after them and not the rest of us.

    Yes, this is what gets me about people's stories of being somehow saved from facing some terrible problem while a few streets away a young child is brutally murdered with no intervention at all. I have no respect for a god who is so snobbishly selective in his good deeds.

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