Angela...Welcome
You will find that this site will really help you, it definetely has helped me! You will soon "get over it"
My Story - This is long...
by GetOverIt 24 Replies latest jw experiences
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GetOverIt
Thanks everyone. Yes, they don't like "smart women" everyone would have been happy if I just allowed myself to be lead. But I refuse. Jesus said he did not come to bring peace, he came with a sword to divide mothers from daughters, etc, etc. So the things that are going on with my family, I'm not surprised. Hurt but not surprised. Same as with my friend. She's too lazy to pick up the Bible, or the Watchtowers for that fact and allow whatever she's told to be her "truth". I pray she doesn't lose her life for that. Surely there must be a clause for ignonorance (note sarcasam). Now I'm the enemy. I can deal with that. I knew it was coming. However, I'm responsible for my salvation, not the WTBTS...the modern day Titantic.
- Angela
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Namaste
Thank you for taking the time to tell your story Angela and welcome to JWD. You look like you have a lot to offer to the discussion and your passion for finding your truth shines through.
So glad to have you here!
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OnTheWayOut
"I wouldnt' want you for a Bible Study. You think to deep!"
You did a remarkable job of seeing the JW's for what they are. You were able to
piece things together nicely to figure out what's wrong with them. You don't just
focus on doctrines but also attitudes that are not very Christlike.A brother came and told us we had to move from there. So I could see other people moving but it was during lunch time. So I nicely asked him if he could find us a place to sit because I have all these babies and I'm trying not to distrub anyone. He just walked away with a half smile/smirk on his face.
That part takes me back. I could have been that brother (not that exact brother, but in a similar
situation). The organization trains the men just enough to go ask the mothers to keep the children
quiet, but not enough to show love and understanding. I was uncomfortable saying anything to
mothers because I recognized the problem of "What are they to do to please us?" I would try to
let the parents decide for themselves how to solve their dilema, but then I would be directed to
help remove the disturbance. JW's can be so strange with that. It's like they feel guilty for
focusing on your kids instead of the talk, so they get huffy about the disturbance. It's not your
kids fault that they are bored with the talk and so are the adults.Thanks for posting your story and taking me back to see my own shortcomings. I like to think
that I outgrew the shortcomings before I outgrew the JW's. -
monophonic
great experience and i'm glad you got out and are still working on the mental part of the mindF---.
i used to go to the cow palace too. for the last six years i was going i always sat in the brown seats and when my friends would walk by, the ones cruisin' during the session, i'd stage whisper their name and hang with them for a bit. it was a blast. my wife would just cover her eyes laughing.
brown seats ruled! as did the xanax to get through the sessions.
[slow motion voice]: 'aren't we glad that we as jehovah's people don't have to worry about our future like the world which satan controls' ----> booming applause.
so, so glad to be out of that.
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monophonic
i was security attendent at one assembly, but only dealt with parking lot issues.....but, at the kh, man, if you didn't pounce on sisters when their babies made one squeal, the elder running the attendents was lecturing you in the back to do your job better.
i felt really bad for what we had to do as attendents.
one single sister chose to sit in the back library and listen to the talk and we'd always kick her out, again, i could care less but the brother in charge of us was agro....looking back she could've had social issues or something.
the elders don't care one bit, it's all about power.
i take that back, i think there's a percentage of elders who care and think they can do their part to make changes from within, but 100+ years of arrogance in leadership in the borg will take more than a few good hearted elders to change things.
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Exterminator
Thank you for sharing your interesting story, Angela.
WT propaganda makes witnesses swallow the spiritual paradise myth, while they tend to consider the lack of love as a local anomaly. You were shrewd enough to discern the pattern. The same pattern that affects all American churches, to my opinion. I'm glad that none of them is allowed to preach its own righteousness and wreck havoc in this country.
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R.Crusoe
It's kind of you to share your story Angela! A long journey and still way to go! I was converted to JW belief around 20 ish. Weird how dates are so vague. My mind was like a scriptural office paper basket full of texts and undecided which to shred! JWs stood unique for me in their rebuttal of any hell fire! Also the submissiveness of the Son to his Fathers will even on the point of death! And the idea of forgiving even the sinners who had murdered (whether in war or peacetime) or harlots who would in those days be viewed as perverts and stoned to death! I was amazed to learn the apostle Paul had killed Christians before becoming one! So my eyes were being opened about beliefs I held that were completely ingrained in my emotion. My emotions really did evolve into ones where I developed understanding before allowing myself to judge anyone. And so I was all the more ready to take the rough with the smooth without ever realizing how rough things would be - and from the inside rather than outside. Your personal space is the loneliest place when love and friendship are absent. This was my experience! My personal space was divided and so in permanent conflict! It appears you have had similar feelings! But since I had become a JW after CofE with Catholic influences, I realized how everything I had accepted was just because I was born to it! I then started to look beyond at other lands and feel that Buddhism/Hindu ways of thinking are far more like who I am as a person. However I still hold the 'weaker' beliefs of Jesus in my heart because I see his philosophy as being the only way that will ever help equality be realized by humanity. Much fighting for equality is not so! It is a fight to gain dominance from a position of weakness! That is why I prefer Buddhism and humanitarian belief systems! And so I do not believe in heel fire. I do not care if I die and am gone forever. And if I am to carry on afterwards then it will be decided after I die! I will do my best today with what there is to do! If fun comes along I will join in! That is it!
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snowbird
Thanks for sharing your story, Angela, and welcome to the board.
I went thru most of what you experienced. New mom with a non-JW mate trying to make the meetings and keep my dynamo of a daughter from disturbing anyone. It was a hard job with all the judgmental stares and whispers. I know exactly how you felt.
You're right. The WTS has no need of smart women. Ask probing questions and you're "marked." They want parrots and drones.
Since I left the JW's, I don't go to any church services. I study the Bible on my own and try to follow the teachings of the Master, Jesus of Nazareth. I firmly believe that is all that is required of us.
Can I assume from your avatar picture that you're Black? If you are, you should find the early WT's perception of Blacks to be quite revealing. You can access this info at Randy Watters' website - Free Minds, Inc.
Again, it's so good to read your story. You write clearly and well.
Sylvia
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XOCO
Welcome Getting Over It
I really really like ur epic story. XOCO just can't stand trifling ppl in the org u know girl, anyway when u start question things they try to give u a reason for why its but never give you the other side of things.*sigh*. anyways keep posting around u are among friends here.
Holla XOCO