(Tongue in cheek) Startup planning for a new religion

by journey-on 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Yes, Gopher...I like your suggesstion.

    We will have Elderettes and Menstrual Servants. Thank you for asking.

  • changeling
    changeling

    You are pretty clever, darlin, but I think I'll pass.

    changeling

  • AWAKE&WATCHING
    AWAKE&WATCHING

    Have you picked out 2-3 scriptures that we can base our new religion on?

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Oh, come on Changeling.

    You think about it. I'll send you one of my brochures. Look it over and I'll make a return visit in a few days.

    I'm sure after you read about the New Way Spirit, you'll have a change of heart. I'll be back.

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Ah, yes, AWAKE&WATCHING, we do need trigger scriptures. Unfortunately, my New Way is not entirely

    based upon the Bible. As I said, I have read, studied, and contemplated, not to mention meditated and the

    New Way draws from all spiritual disciplines. I must search out a few of those I can use over and over and

    over and over and over.

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    ummmm, ohhhhh, eeeeeee, ahhhhhhhh, no thanks.

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Now..now, Hortensia

    I can tell by looking at you, you're set in your ways. Just let one of our highly motivated sales reps

    call on you with one of our fascinating magazines or books and present our message to you with loving

    intentions, and we can soften that stubborn old attitude right up.

  • memario
    memario

    Well aaa, lets see I got the means, the time, the wheels(4 door sedan) I got half a brain.

    HEY WAIT A MINUTE !!!YOU ALMOST GOT ME THERE!!! NO THANKS!!!

    pheewww! I almost got sucked into that one!!

    mem

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Memario

    I may need to appeal to your drive to "be somebody." Now just think. If you are a high school graduate or even if you're not,

    you can rise in my organization to a POSITION of authority. If you prove yourself to be one of our more productive salesmen,

    you can become a leader of one of our groups in your area. Now think about that! Think of all the prestige and respect you

    will receive from others who have not achieved the sales figures you have. They will look up to you big time. You can become

    THE BIG CHEESE by simply dedicating enough of your time and energy to get your sales up to our required levels. And just

    think of the New Way Spirit Points you will earn!!!

  • Tigerman
    Tigerman

    I'm ready to join, but I don't want to start off as a layman. I've had 6 mos of lituature training and I feel I'm ripe and ready for the calling. I feel my background should seat me somewhere toward the top of the organization.Everything you have said makes perfect sense to me and I am indeed one of your chosen disciples.I even feel it in my bones . . .well one anyway, for the thought of controlling many allows me such a sense of purpose that I cannot fight the tingling that's working its way up my virgin loins.Agasp! There it is, the fountain that erupts, even though secured in my trousers; the creamy rabbitt that jumps out of the hole only to splash against the pants handed down to me by my brother. Oh, what will mother say on washday?! But, I digress.Take me with you dear brother( or sister) my soul is yours. My labor for you to do as you please.Just keep me abreast of the latest visions that you see, that is all I ask, and I will be yours forever.

    ( Can we once again go over that part where we will be controlling many? )

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