Question for Ex-Elders

by okiesooner1966 17 Replies latest jw experiences

  • erynw

    Yeah, I smoke too and told my friend that I would quit before we went on vacation to Disneyworld in December. WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!!!

  • oompa

    If they want to, they could probably DF you for saying gezhuntite if someone sneezed.

    and yes save money and health-let it go.....oompa

  • ldrnomo

    There are a lot of circumstances here, first your father is an elder so it depends on him whether he will say anything or not. If he does how he presents it to the body, What do the other elders think of him, do they highly respect him? How does the elder body view you? All these things have a bearing on what they will do. The bottom line is, they can df you. The other bottom line is it's not just your body and your health, it's your childs future life and health. You have the freedom to do what you want. Use that freedom to quit. PLEASE FOR YOUR CHILD! AND WIFE!

  • lalliv01

    Uzzah has it right. If your community does not view or recognize you as one of JW's, then there is no need to single you out for any reason.

    By "your community", I mean all inside and outside the Org. If anyone inside or outside the WT knows that you are a JW and that you

    are smoking,then you are a "blotch", (sorry), upon their "good" name.

    You know smoking is bad. When you get older, you will surely regret ever having smoked. I'm not judging you,but as a brother, I advice you

    to quit smoking.

  • What-A-Coincidence
  • fresia

    I had the same problem, was a heavy smoker even more so when I faded out, when I was tracked down by a family member and asked study, I never told them I was smoking, when the elders came around I admitted I had a problem but stopped, which I did and havent' smoked for 17mths, I just stopped.

    It is very hard I know but the freedom when you don't have to live a double life is fantastic. Not so much the religion but the not sneaking around.

    I wish you luck. They will ask if you were smoking while attending meeting and field service if you say yes then they can DF you, if you say no and you have only been smoking since been inactive they cant DF you.

    Good luck.

  • avidbiblereader

    As said it will depend on the BOE, also if they get a chance to question you adn find out that you were doing it while being a witness will not sit good as they will then say it was the HS that directed this to happen and also if you have much contact with witnesses and they assume you are still recognized as a witness because of your association MAY have a profound outcome on you, being your father is an elder he may stave off the lions for a while or indefinitely because his own emotions to you and the grandchild.

    No rime or reason to the things that happen but it is not as they say in 1 Cor 1:10, they dont all speak in agreement.


  • OnTheWayOut

    Forgive me if it was brought up, but I am answering before reading all the replies.
    Yes, you can be DF'ed for this.

    The bigger concern- you told your parents that your five year old is lying. While you
    might have softened that, that's how the five year old will see it when grandparents
    re-address the situation.

    That means that they will side with the JW grandparents if you are DF'ed and start
    trying to teach the five year old about the WTS. "Dad lied on me, he's probably lying
    on them."

    Since you were caught, come clean. Face the consequences and apologize.
    Minimize any problems between you and your child before worrying about the cult.

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