Confused!! Help!!

by BigBloomerz 36 Replies latest social relationships

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  BizzyBee

  Not telling you what to do, but suggesting a way of thinking about your circumstance:

  Mentally take Mr. Wonderful out of the equation for a moment. Consider your feelings about what you call "the truth." If you decide that it is the truth and you want to be part of it, then Mr. Wonderful either has to go or join you in it. He deserves honest answers to his questions: you would fight a blood transfusion for your child, you would not celebrate holidays, etc.

  You cannot move forward until you make the first decision - JW or not?
• 

  BigBloomerz

  I guess i've never really gievn the FOG that much thought, thanks what you wrote made sense. I think maybe i have to sort out what i want from life, before putting him through stress and undecisivness.
• 

  Purza

  what next?

  Have you considered fading?

  I have to say I have found it interesting talking to worldly people about the future. More specifically, my husband. He is content with living life to the fullest and doing good towards others. He is not constantly worried about what will happen when he dies as he has no control over that. He hopes there is more, but does not push himself to the extreme to make sure he gets there. He is very happy and content with his way of thinking.

  It took me a while to grasp his way of thinking since I was raised I was never going to die. Now I know I will die eventually. I admit, it is very hard to come to terms with. However, it is much better than breaking my back trying to serve an organization in the hopes that I will make it into the new system. Once you get away from the JW way of thinking, you look back and wonder why you stuck with it so long. Or at least, that is what think now.

  Purza
• 

  Madame Quixote

  what do i do regards the future?

  We can't tell you what to do. Well, we can, but that would just be preaching. We can only tell you what we have done:

  • gone to college and learned a lot of cool stuff
  • read a lot of cool stuff
  • watched a lot of cool stuff
  • traveled to cool places
  • raised kids who are imperfect and un-brainwashed
  • learned how to use computers (at least a little)
  • built careers based on reality, not false hopes
  • made new friends and new families in the real world, not in a cult
  • worked a lot and played some
  • helped other people who didn't look, talk, think or act just like we do
  • loved, lived, aged, won, and lost various battles
  • accepted life on life's terms
  • and quite a few of us have left our birth families and "the Society" in the dust, and it's really okay. It took a lot of time for some of us to realize this, but it's okay.
• 

  blueviceroy

  choosing to be married is a big thing your life will forever be atered often during my marriage i struggeled with the commitment. my wife is not a believer and does not even want to hear about prayer let alone the message. but i love her with all i have she is special and exceptional and im lucky to have her . i think god would like us to be happy and if you live right you can show your spouse that there is a better way simply by showing good Christlike behavior i dont go to kingdom halls or meetings but an elder comes to my house once a week and we study in my home . the learning is important and the presence of Jehovah i s important but my wifes beliefs are preety well set my son is given the message by me and he has all the proper tools for making good choices, i hope oneday we can all go to meetings as a family but untill then i will just do my best to be a good example and pray for my family i will also pray for you as you will have to decide if what is in the bible really means anything to you being lukewarm wont get you anywhere and real peace only comes when we folloow gods will asking people for advice is usually fishing for what we want to hear and some prayer and contemplation will certainly give us the answer we need.
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  jgnat

  Welcome to the board, blueviceroy, and an interesting first post.
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  BigBloomerz

  More specifically, my husband. He is content with living life to the fullest and doing good towards others. He is not constantly worried about what will happen when he dies as he has no control over that. He hopes there is more, but does not push himself to the extreme to make sure he gets there. He is very happy and content with his way of thinking.

  That is the way my bf views things, he just concentrates on the now and plans ahead for the future, kids, bigger house, more money, holidays and so on. From a witness point of view that would be considered materialistic, but i can understand why those things are important!
• 

  BigBloomerz

  gone to college and learned a lot of cool stuff

  read a lot of cool stuff

  watched a lot of cool stuff

  traveled to cool places

  raised kids who are imperfect and un-brainwashed

  learned how to use computers (at least a little)

  built careers based on reality, not false hopes

  made new friends and new families in the real world, not in a cult

  worked a lot and played some

  helped other people who didn't look, talk, think or act just like we do

  loved, lived, aged, won, and lost various battles

  accepted life on life's terms

  and quite a few of us have left our birth families and "the Society" in the dust, and it's really okay. It took a lot of time for some of us to realize this, but it's okay.

  Madame Quixote...Thank you, this made me chuckle!
• 

  nvrgnbk

  Sorry.

  Be happy.

  I know there are no easy answers.
• 

  greendawn

  Welcome to the forum BigBloomerz, there is no point in sticking around with the JWs in order to see people getting resurrected soon, that is in fact one of the many myths they propagate to lure people into their org.
  
  If you really feel this guy is right you should go for it, from what you say I gather you are not really into the JW religion anyway.