Stop college or keep plugging on?...opinions please.

by FreedomFrog 40 Replies latest jw friends

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog

    Here's my situation...I'm doing college online because I can't very well do college the traditional way with a 2 year old. Anyway, my computer has been acting really funny and it's not reliable anymore. My ex worked on it for almost 4 hours and the darn thing still crashes saying my "virtual" memory is too low.

    If I continue on with these online courses, the loan is going up. My plan when I started this was to continue with college until Sierra started school (in about 3 more years). Now I'm thinking about "dropping" out of the online courses and wait until she starts then go into Columbus State Univ.

    The pro's of stopping now...

    1. I can heal better with my divorce and lose additional stress of the college responsibilities.
    2. The payment of the loan shouldn't be too high with the classes I've already completed since it's only been a year's worth.
    3. I don't have to worry about my computer going on the fritz and fretting over how to get my next assignment in.
    4. I can have complete paper books instead of parts of online books (the online books the college I'm now attending only lets us have partial books and it's annoying because I pay $210. for each course of books and not get the full (every chapter) book.
    5. I'm so burned out and hence the "panic" attack that happened a few days ago.

    The con's

    1. I've been in the online classes for a year and I don't really know what my student loan is at the moment.
    2. I've gotten this far
    3. I have to wait until my daughter starts school before I can go back to college.
    4. I have no degree to get a decent job so I'll have to continue on with my odds and ends jobs such as baby sitting and house cleaning.
    5. I'll feel a bit like a failure even though it's my plans to go back when my daughter gets older.

    The main pro is that I am so burned out and stressing over this because of my computer crashing every other day that this would take a big load off my shoulders and I can concentrate on healing from the divorce and other things happening in my life.

    The main con is that I'm afraid that I will feel like a failure to me, my kids and others that know I'm in college right now.

    Anyway, what are your thoughts...I'm going to weigh this very carefully before I make the phone call on Monday..

    Thanks all,

    Froggy

  • FreedomFrog
    FreedomFrog

    Dag nabbit...I proof read my stupid post but didn't think about checking the subject... I meant "plunging on"...boy I so need more college education...lmao...oh well.

    I'm typing this very exhausted....my brain is fried.

  • lrkr
    lrkr

    Everyones situation is different but, my experience (I went to a "correspondence" college while working full time, my wife went to regular college full time) is that life tends to get more hectic, not less. While life with a two year old is hectic, life with an 8 year old is more. However, my wife and I helped each other and so your situation is different. The job placement opportunities and assistance that a typical 4 year school provide are extremely helpful. However a correspondence or online school can be useful to knock out some of the more typical, entry level college courses (English 101, Psych 101, etc.) so that when you go to the more expensive 4 year school you can concentrate on more core curriculum.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    Can you go part time? Have more time now for work, and child, and less computer woes. Or, are you positive you will go when the baby goes to school? Hard decision. I'd say at least take one class per semester for now. You will not feel so far behind when you can go full time later. Just don't give up. You must get the education, for yourself, and your example to your child.

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    "Plugging on" is a perfectly valid expression!

    I am doing my undergrad degree online too, and can relate to most of that. I had the funds to replace my laptop this term but it threw my study plans out a week and you've probably had it happen that once you're behind it's difficult to catch up again. Anyway... our situations are slightly different in that I'm in the kind of work that I'll probably keep doing when I finally graduate, I'm not actually very ambitious and am only studying for personal development reasons. I failed a science degree years ago and have felt dumb since. Right. The schedule of my course goes: four 13-week terms a year = 52 weeks. Week 14 is exam week AND week 1 of the next term, so there's no break between terms. It's possible to enrol in four units per term so that a 24-unit degree can be finished in 18 months, but I've never heard of it happening. I did four terms in a row last year and became miserable, put on 10kg and developed an inexplicable pain in my shoulder. I've since decided that for lifestyle reasons I'm going to take eight years to finish. It's not worth hurrying it at that price. So my input is that it's okay to slow down. You have what seems to be a neatly balanced list of pros and cons, but you might have to prioritise each of them more thoroughly to decide which way to go.

  • Justitia Themis
    Justitia Themis

    If you are in the U.S., have you actually met with a student advisor at a 4 year college? You may qualify for more assistance than your know, perhaps enough to enable to you work less, or not at all, and concentrate on your studies.

    And, hopefully you have researched the job market for the degree that you are pursuing. At the end, you want to make sure you are highly employable. A degree in English Literature is not going to get you the same amount of job offers as...say...a degree in Accounting.

    Justitia

  • Carmel
    Carmel

    First off, you're not a "failure" regardless of which road you travel. You may want to back off for a semester or two and re-evaluate. Circumstances may change and you'll have different options. You might look into grants for technology, i.e. micosoft and others often will reward persons in your circumstance with re-conditioned computer... I wish you well. carmel

  • davegod
    davegod

    I say plug on! Life will not get easier at all, time will not be made longer. It goes faster and faster as you age. The one thing you can do is better yourself now for the long run. That will make life easier for you and your kid. Quiters never win, winners never quit. They did'nt pen that for no reason

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    It's harder when you're an adult making a transition. I should have gone to college after high school, but I waited until I was 37 to start. It was the hardest thing I ever did, but well worth it. I say keep on with the schooling. There will always be things to make it tough. If it's not one thing it's another. Problems are part of life, and will never go away. Get the education while you can.

    W

  • Scully
    Scully

    There's no doubt about it: being a serious college student is hard work; being a serious college student with a couple of kids is even harder. The rewards of sticking it out and finishing are astronomical though.

    Speaking from my own experience, I have an idea of the stresses and conflicts that you're up against. Stopping part way through, though, wasn't an option for me. I dropped out of college once before (after high school) due to pressure from family and the congregation. It took me over a decade to get back to it, and by then none of my previous credits were worth anything - even the electives in English and Humanities didn't count for anything anymore. I was afraid - even though I was sometimes overwhelmed by everything that was on my plate - that if I quit or took a break, that I'd end up putting it on the back burner again for goodness knows how long or even worse, just abandon my plans all together.

    Having said that, can you see yourself plodding along, paying for a student loan on courses that you might never get back to? That was one of the big deterrents for me to dropping out. I'd already invested the time and effort to get this far, and the loan was looming over my head. I realized that I owed it to myself to finish my course to the very end. Yes, the loan was bigger in the end, but my wages were triple what they would have been had I stuck to minimum wage retail jobs, and now almost a decade later, they've doubled again. I can manage the loan, but I would have always regretted it, though, had I quit part way through the process. I just knew that once I had a taste for learning again, it would feel like a failure to me if I quit - and it felt like it would be held against me in some ways too. I couldn't have handled that - it would have eaten away at me forever.

    Have you looked into applying for scholarships to help alleviate some of the financial pressure? There's usually something for single moms trying to improve their lot in life. Apply for as many of these scholarships as you can.

    If housing is an issue, maybe there's a way that you can find another mom in a situation similar to yours where you can rent a house together and share the expenses and the running of the household and help each other stay motivated with school work too.

    Since you're doing your studies online, is it possible to take a breather for the summer so you can just catch your breath and start fresh in the fall? Or maybe taking a course through the summer might help ease the pressure during the course of the next semester? I've done it both ways, and each approach has its advantages and disadvantages.

    Do you have the option to take courses on a part-time basis - maybe one or two per semester, instead of a full course load? That will stretch things out a bit longer, but it will keep you engaged in your learning and maybe make it more managable while the children are still young.

    Whatever you decide, don't give up! An education is a gift you give to yourself - you deserve this!

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