DESCRIBE HOW YOU WILL DIE

by Terry 64 Replies latest jw friends

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  skeeter1

  I forgot to add "when I'm 107 years old."

  Skeeter
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  nvrgnbk

  I forgot to add "when I'm 107 years old."

  Skeeter
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  Brother Apostate

  Much to think about:

  "Once when I was in Hawaii, on the island of Kauai, I met a mysterious old stranger. He said he was about to die and wanted to tell someone about the treasure. I said, 'Okay, as long as it's not a long story. Some of us have a plane to catch, you know.' He started telling his story, about the treasure and his life and all, and I thought: 'This story isn't too long.' But then, he kept going, and I started thinking, 'Uh-oh, this story is getting long.' But then the story was over, and I said to myself: 'You know, that story wasn't too long after all.' I forget what the story was about, but there was a good movie on the plane. It was a little long, though." -Jack Handey
  
  "I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.'" -Jack Handey
  
  "If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures, to teach him to do some tricks. But ONLY if you're serious about adopting the vulture." -Jack Handey

  "After I die, wherever my spirit goes, I'm going to try to get back and visit my skeleton at least once a year, because, 'Hey, old buddy, how's it going?'" -Jack Handey
  
  "When you die, if you go somewhere where they ask you a bunch of questions about your life and what you learned and all, I think a good way to get out of it is just to say, 'No speaka English.'" -Jack Handey

  "Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait. Not me, you." -Jack Handey
  
  "When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, ummmm, boy." -Jack Handey
  
  Let children walk with Nature, let them see the beautiful blendings and communions of death and life, their joyous inseparable unity, as taught in woods and meadows, plains and mountains and streams of our blessed star, and they will learn that death is stingless indeed, and as beautiful as life. -John Muir

  Do not pass by my epitaph, traveler.
  But having stopped, listen and learn, then go your way.
  There is no boat in Hades, no ferryman Charon,
  No caretaker Aiakos, no dog Cerberus.
  All we who are dead below
  Have become bones and ashes, but nothing else.
  I have spoken to you honestly, go on, traveler,
  Lest even while dead I seem loquacious to you.-Roman Tombstone

  To be, or not to be: that is the question:
  Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
  The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
  Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
  And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
  No more; and by a sleep to say we end
  The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
  That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
  Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
  To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
  For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
  When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
  Must give us pause: there's the respect
  That makes calamity of so long life;
  For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
  The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
  The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
  The insolence of office and the spurns
  That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
  When he himself might his quietus make
  With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
  To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
  But that the dread of something after death,
  The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
  No traveller returns, puzzles the will
  And makes us rather bear those ills we have
  Than fly to others that we know not of?
  Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
  And thus the native hue of resolution
  Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
  And enterprises of great pith and moment
  With this regard their currents turn awry,
  And lose the name of action. - Soft you now!
  The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
  Be all my sins remember'd. - William Shakespeare
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  jaguarbass

  I hope I die in my sleep. But you never know. I ride a motorcycle. I work in a jail. And I live in the lightning capital of the world.
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  BluesBrother

  Suicide.. I don't want to linger on in a lonely and embittered old age
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  OnTheWayOut

  DESCRIBE HOW YOU WILL DIE

  I don't know the details, but I do know this:

  I will die in THIS SYSTEM OF THINGS, not being put to death by Jehovah, but
  death will come from something else. No matter how far off my death is,
  Armageddon will not have arrived or be on the horizon.

  I hope my wife and I die of old age, sitting on our porch rocking chairs. A group
  of JW's approaches us to tell us how "Armageddon is right around the corner."
  We die of laughter. What a way to go. The mortician can't get the smiles off
  our faces.
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  R.Crusoe

  When I was younger I always thought I might drop dead after tending to the needs of thousands of adoring women all after my body!

  But now that it's all passed me by I'm lost, delusional and your question goes around my head like a psychological pinball racking up a high score and driving me insane - in fact I think I'm gonna kill myself trying to work out an answer -don't ask me any more life threatening questions!
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  El Kabong

  I'll be pining for the fjords
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  brinjen

  I hope to die as a senior citizen, attempting to have sex in my wheelchair.
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  Anti-Christ

  Shark or bear attack.