The will of the human spirit is...well it's amazing. I got a call a week ago last Thursday night that my sister in law who is dying of pancreatic cancer in CA was admitted to hospice, removed from her feeding tube and had at best a couple of days left because her organs were shutting down. I got on a plane on Monday, along with my sister and mother from Chicago and flew to San Diego thinking we were going to a funeral. Well...damned if she didnt wake up, recognize us and hug us and cry and cry...it was at the same time joyful because we got to say goodbye and devastating that she was continuing to suffer so... The family was gathered around her every day and as I type this...off food and 95% of all liquids because she cant process anything...she remains alive! 11 days off of her feeding tube. It was a constant flow of people from her church, friends, family, neighbors coming in to bid her farewell. They expect 500-700 people at the funeral. My brother showed me where she will be laid to rest and it is a beautiful peaceful cemetary, under a huge shade tree in the shadow of the steeple from her church.
And you guys were right..."what to do" became immediately apparent when we got to my brothers house. There were people bringing big dinners which he hadnt touched and so had to unfortunately be tossed. And some were "cleaning" but it was like...lick and a promise type thing. So my sister my mother and I tore into it for four days and left it very VERY clean. I even cleaned out the pantry with his 13 year old daughter who now knows what they have in house and we made a list and went shopping together (which she and I both enjoyed) and bought supplies to fill the pantry. We cleaned out the frig the same way and got a lot of easy take and run food that required no effort for this period where nobody is home much and big meals with everybody sitting just wont be happening until after the funeral...whenver that is. I washed windows and floors and we helped the kids clean out their messy rooms and did probably 20 loads of laundry...and still had time to go to hospice every day. My brother was so happy we were there. And so happy to just come home and fall into bed with clean sheets knowing his kids were cared for his larder was full and he could just concentrate on what needs to happen now. He was exhausted even after "sleeping" because he said his mind never rests these days. He has to be mother and father to three young ones now and thats a daunting task but there are many many friends and her parents and aunts and uncles to help them. I hope that, unlike the JWs, that the mormons continue to help him after she is gone.
Thanks for your support and well wishes for us. I hope now that the lord relieves her from her suffering soon.
love, LoveDubs