Why did they not try to 'Save' me?

by AK - Jeff 46 Replies latest jw experiences

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  avidbiblereader

  When I left, I did not have one visit by any of my elders, haha, my elders. Had one elder from another hall visit me twice when he heard of what happened with my ex leaving me and my daughter and filed for divorce.

  No visits or calls in eight months until they wanted to meet with me for my JC, not one.

  When I was an elder I was known as the shepherding elder and visiting elder because of all the time I would spend calling ones that were sick or missing from the meeting. I got not one visit or call.

  Their teachings sound good but they don't practice what they preach. They wouldn't know Christian love if it fell from heaven and hit them in the head.

  abr
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  Numinous

  It is amazing to me that someone can be in for 20 years and have what I believed to be 100s of "friends", and have elders too afraid of me to see me face to face. DFed for "causing divisions" as so many knew of how I felt, which, of course, cemented my feelings of having done the right thing by talking with them. I was the consummate witness. I felt I had more love for humanity than God. Now THERE'S a problem. I felt that those who were the cruelest to me were ones who resented me because they felt the same way but didn't have the guts to make the same decision. There are two groups, ones who are sincerely trying to do the right thing, and ones who are extremely religious out of guilt from their lives and feel the need to be self-righteous. Leaving will show the true colors of all those who you believe to be your friends.
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  willyloman

  Much wisdom on this thread. Bttt.
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  Nowman

  I have not read all the posts because I had some thoughts....My answer would be that it depends on the Kingdom Hall. When I left at 18, there were so many that harrassed me until I was announced that I was disfellowshipped. Then I heard nothing from anyone even my parents...

  After about 4-5 years, which I had moved out of state, then moved back, my parents must have gotten a hold of some Elders to contact me. They were so very sweet honestly, and I told then very sweet and honestly that I still do not want to be one of Jehovahs Witnesses. Then I have heard nothing ever since, I am fine with it. But, since being on this forum, and learning from what so many here have taught me (without them even knowing it), I dare them to come to my door or call me at home.

  Nikki
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  BluesBrother

  I had been an elder for many years, not always in the latest congregation.. At the time I "stood down" ( Or was removed , it could be interpreted either way ), I was WT Servant, Group Leader and Cong Secretary .. None of them showed any interest in me or my "Spiritual welfare . Soon after that , I stopped reporting.. Nobody said anything .

  A little later I was invited for a "chat" , I went and for one hour we talked and I made my doubts plain. They had no answers and did not ask to see me again. I later found out that my wife had put them up to meeting me - by writing them a scathing letter begging them to reach out to me.

  Why do they not "search for the lost sheep"? - because they don't care ! Once you have dropped off the radar of the inactive file, then you no longer exist and the C/O is not going to ask any awkward questions about you.

  If they do believe what they preach, they don't care that I am supposedly heading for eternal death....PS they don't shepherd the active ones much either, especially if the person is not totally warm and friendly . PHARISEES, the lot of 'em !
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  Crooked Lumpy Vessel

  I remember a talk at an assembly describing JWs as a circle with the most faithful being in the center and the wishy washy brothers and sisters around the outer ring.

  I believe that talks like this and others like it cause division and self righteousness. These self righteous individuals are also only interested in their salvation. Like a sinking ship or a burning building. Save yourself!!!!
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  Quandry

  When my family was still going, but having real problems because of the humiliating, cruel way my teen daughter was disfellowshipped and we were appealing, one elder asked another (and then told us) that he said, "We'd like to help the Quandrys, but they sit out in their car until the meeting starts and then leave right after." THIS WAS A LIE-WE HAD NEVER DONE SUCH A THING.

  Up until then, when all this happened, I would have vehemently sworn that elders would never lie, or treat someone shamefully... boy was I stupid, stuuuuppppiiiiddddd,,STUPID!!!!!