Told wife that I don't like going to the meeting

by XBEHERE 46 Replies latest jw friends

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  jgnat

  I would love to know what's going on in her head man ...You never know if she is finally getting something she has secretly wished for for a long time or what ... you never know. Sometimes when you think they're gonna zig, they zag.

  You've pretty well summed up the mind of a woman, ithinkisee, LOL. We should list you and AuldSoul as experts in husbandly persuasion. It's funny, though. It seems you were both surprised by how quickly your wives responded. It wasn't the words or the logic at all, was it?
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  done4good

  Remember that part of the problem is that women in the Borg have no identity except that of their husband's. It will be hard to stop being an "elder's wife."

  What Blondie said here is important to remember. I wen't through similar things with my ex. While, I'm not saying that we would have been able to overcome our issues anyway, I will say, that had I been more mindful of this, I could have had more peace. It bothered me tremendously that she just "wouldn't get it". So my advice is, expect that she won't "just get it". Give her time, (a lot of time, if your family is worth saving, and it sounds like it is). Help her build an identity outside of the organization, really, this will help make it easier. It's about both of you.

  j
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  ithinkisee

  The WT is right about one thing, the more you miss the easier it gets to keep missing them. They claim its satanic or worldly influence but in reality the meetings just completely suck!

  Yeah, it's called "unplugging from the Matrix". Heh.
  
  -ithinkisee
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  Martini

  Oh boy I feel for you...but you know in your gut that once you get over the hill...relief will come.(for a while)The advice many presented, will work but there may be an easier way.With respect to stepping down as an elder you need simply to be very ASSERTIVE in what YOU want to do with YOUR time and life. Yeah that's it! No big reasons...no lenghty explaination...heck just say "that's it I'm done...if they ask why, be evasive , be vague BUT be pleasant...AND speak with resolve. YES....because between us...we know the reason why they try to bully you into staying as an elder... it is because they are Envious!!!! They are Jealous of you...they themselves have a gut feeling that you are the 'smart one'..you will no longer be slaving for a lost cause...and so they don't want you to get away scott free with what they also want!!! hahaha... Let your body language tell them that you are onto to this little secret! You will look like your reasons are VERY SELFISH...but hey isn't this the better of all evils? haha

  Have a smile on your face...walk tall...be happy...and let your YES mean yes, your no mean NO. Keep your replies simple yet free from suspicion... except that you are taking charge of your life and that from now on...you will be doing thiings your way...that's it! This will help in doing the SLOW FADE AWAY...OUT to where they too would LOVE to be.

  Oh and it's better to do this while you are still some what "ignorant" about the truth regarding the "troof".

  Ignorance is bliss!

  just my 2 cents

  Martini
• 

  cultBgone

  I'm sure the rest of your story is on the boards but I don't have time to go through so many posts, so...

  Can we get the updated story? Would love to know what's happened over the past seven years!
• 

  Frazzled UBM

  cultBgone - A quick read of XBEHERE's other posts shows that he did the unthinkable and went back to being an elder in full knowledge of TTATT because of harassment from his missus. It is hard not to feel a touch of melancholy for XBEHERE's predicament. Like you I would be interested to her from the man himslef about how he is holding up in his predicament. Fraz
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  cultBgone

  Wow, frazz, thanks for the update. Guess I should have read farther but there were pages and pages...lol

  I cannot imagine even walking into a kh feeling the way I do, knowing ttatt. How screwed up would it make you to go back as an elder? Sheeze.