Round 2 disastor

thebiggestlie

Round two with me and my parents went terrble last night. My mother was sobbing and my dad had the biggext look of dissapointment on his face. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't think straight. I failed and lost miserably, I felt the lowest ive ever felt in my short life. Oh and i got an elders meeting coming my way.... i feel sick..... talk more when i can

mia_b

(((tbl)))

Scully

They may not be slapping you around, but what you are experiencing is a type of bullying.

Do you have access, through school - like the guidance counsellor - or a 1-800 phone number to a "kids help phone" or something like that? If you are only 17, you could call child welfare and explain your situation and get some assistance and physically present person to act on your behalf. You may even be able to get a legal aid lawyer to help you for free.

Your parents need to realize that they cannot control you forever, yet this is exactly what they are trying to do by bringing the elders in to the matter. They're bringing in the big scary dog - the elder - to force you into submission, because they think you don't have anyone in your corner. You need to bring in someone - a bigger scarier dog - who can stop this behaviour in its tracks.

luna2

That's the hardest thing about being a minor and living with your parents. Its a their house/their rules kind of thing. I was much the same when I was a dub and my son was living at home. It would be nice if we could see our way clear to letting our kids express themselves and make their own choice on religious beliefs, but that's just not the way it works most of the time.

Writing down and researching, in the WTS's own publications, a few of the points about the religion that bother you the most might have an impact on them. Thing is, if they are happy believing, they won't understand why you aren't. All the reasoning in the world won't make a dent if they aren't ready to hear it. Plus if you get worked up and start yelling, it makes the whole thing so much more stressful. Your parents are going to be fearful and disappointed. They think this junk is the honest to Jah truth and that you are gonna end up dead forever if they don't save you.

Maybe back off of the confrontation for a while, concentrate on saving money (if you don't have a job, get one), and doing well in school. Prepare to be able to move out when the time comes.

Junction-Guy

If I remember correctly, he mentioned in an earlier post that he has been home schooled all his life, which makes his situation even more complicated.

fullofdoubtnow

So sorry to hear that tbl.

It must be very hard to get your point of view across to someone who really doesn't want to listen to it. I'm not surprised that your parents are bringing the elders in, they probably think the elders will be able to "talk some sense into you". When you do see them, I would concur with Scullys' advice, and suggest you have someone with you, preferably a non jw.

Try to be non confrontational with your parents though - they love you and want what's best for you, which in their mind is to be a jw.

good luck

Linda

Crumpet

I wish I could be there to hold your hand sweetheart! Remember the bullies are always wrong. Just because you are younger doesnt mean you have to tolerate this treatment indefinitely. Just maintain your dignity dude. Try and earn their respect by behaving as calmly and reasonably as possible - this might make them stop for a mo and wonder why they are behaving like the children in this situation.

Come back and talk when you can but do not take risks - your computer is your link to the outside world it seems and they are probably going to use any excuse to use this. I wish you had an adult nearby that you could talk to and get support from. I would definitely try your local college. No one has to get involved but it will help you have the courage to make the right decisions for you if you have someone on your side as it were.

Am thinking of you!

AlmostAtheist

Hey Dude,

>>I couldn't think straight. I failed and lost miserably, I felt the lowest ive ever felt in my short life.

When you say you "lost", do you mean you couldn't answer their questions?

I have to say, by speaking up at all, you WON. This is all new to you, whereas they are parroting words that have existed for over 100 years. Naturally, they were able to cut you to ribbons with scriptures and reasoning and so forth. Give yourself a little time to get your feet under you. And don't feel bad for "losing"... you're well on your way to escaping the crippled life of a cult-member, and doing so before you even reach 20 years of age! You are totally winning!

Dave

crazyblondeb

bighug

Give yourself a big hug, and a pat on the back. I've been exactly where you are, and I know it's not fun. Just know we are all here pulling for you.

shelley

ithinkisee

I know this won't help right now, but I just think it is so great you have a forum like this to remind you that you aren't the crazy one. I never had this kind of resource when I was your age (in 1990). For that reason I am very happy for you (even though you feel like crap now).

You will come out of this a stronger person. I guarantee it.

-ithinksee

Round 2 disastor

Share this