Round 2 disastor (page 2)

juni

Hi guy,

You have got a lot of good information. Like Luna mentioned, I also did the same thing w/my 4 kids and I went through a terrible time after I left remembering what I put them through.

Your parents want the best for you and in their minds it is the JW way. They sincerely believe that with all their heart. They do love you. But legally 18 is the "age of majority" whereby you can legally make your own break from your parents w/o the police knocking at your door.

Are you being homeschooled as Dave had asked you? I did w/2 of my kids for a while. Then my son went back to public school for 9th grade and my daughter signed on w/The American School in Chicago and then finished classes at the technical college to get a high school equivalency diploma. The high school's principal where she would've attended was very nice and impressed w/her superb knowledge and thinking ability. Now she is 31 and has been very successful. My son is successful at his job also. I am very proud of both of them.

I also would have to suggest for you to focus on what you need to accomplish now and that is getting your high school diploma. A part time job would also help you get your "feet wet" in the work world and build upon your self esteem. All of my kids had jobs away from school and enjoyed it.

Sooooooo.....take a deep breath and know that your parents love you very much. Get your diploma and if they approve find a part time job. You will be building your character and gaining experience in the work world. Then go from there with your decisions for the next step. We all have gone through the process of moving from childhood to adulthood and it isn't easy even if you are not a Jehovah't Witness.

I wish you the best and we are here for you to be a support.

Juni

bernadette

((((Thebiggestlie))))) The wts has taught your parents to bully you back into the truth. The elders will do the same.

What worked for me and my daughter was to say that we were/would be discussing everything that happens to us with a counsellor. Our counsellor was attached to our family doctor. Bullies totally back off when someone appears on the scene, whom they perceive as being more powerful than themselves.

At the end of the day though your parents love you very much and they think you are in terrible danger.

all the best

bernadette

Do Not Call

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling low. (((((thebiggestlie)))))
Hope things get better for you soon. This cruel religion has conditioned your parents to act this way, but you must keep doing what you know is best for you. It's your life! You're a brave chap and we all admire you for being honest with your parents.

Loads of love and hugs,
DNC XXXXX

RAF

(((TBL))) I feel for you !!!

I couldn't think straight. I failed and lost miserably, I felt the lowest ive ever felt in my short life

What is really low is "hypocrisy" ... you can step back if you need to for anythingcould help to get to the point you need in the time it will be possible for you ...
(your Parents are scared - and because of that you may be scared or your Parents reactions - which could lead to some very unconfortable situation at your age) STEP BACK IF NEEDED ... (it's not a question of honnor since it's a question of TIME and relevance on how to get out of this with minimum damages both sides).

free2think

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((TBL)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry life is so hard for you at the moment, I just wanted you to know that I'll be thinking of you.

free2think

Narkissos

((((((((((tbl))))))))))

As Dave wrote, you won already. And -- I apologise for the "Christian" sound of that -- your greater strength is your weakness. If you are not able to spend the rest of your life lying to yourself, or others, no matter how sick you may feel now about it, you will be out, no matter when or how, and everything else will eventually settle. Breathe, one step at a time.

LtCmd.Lore

Oh boy... this is all happening way to fast. You NEED time to prepare yourself.

Do you know ANYBODY who is not a witness? Personally I have my grandparents to fall back on for love and help if I my parents shun me. Are your grandparents close? They're not JWs too are they? (I also was homeschooled and therefore know what it's like to not have any friends I can count on.)

How far are you from being able to support yourself? Cause once you reach that point, the only thing at stake is your emotions.

Like RAF said, if you need time, then by all means, GIVE YOURSELF TIME! Nobody will think less of you for it... it's not a matter of honor, it's your life, do everything in your power to make your life better.

We're all rooting for you.

LtCmd.Lore

choosing life

My son left the jws and home at the age of 17. It was such a shock to me and I was emotionally devastated. All I could think of was that I was going to lose him. First to disfellowshipping and then to death. I still believed in the jws and could not get it through my head that he just did not believe it. And I doubt your parents feel much better right now than you do.

Do what is best for you and your parents. That may seem to be a contradiction. Only you know your situation and your parents. Remember that they truly love you. It won't be that long until you are of legal age. Getting your high school diploma and a job, if they allow, will give you the freedom you want eventually. Until then, you may have to pretend for a while or just hold your tongue. Nobody can make you believe something you don't believe.

Put all your efforts into setting up the situation that will allow you to live your own life. It won't be that long before you are free to do as you please. By the way, my son and I get along very well now. You never know what the future will bring.

boofhead

I sympathize with your situation. Do you have any other friends/relatives that are not jw's that you could stay with? You need to take some time out and focus on what's really important to you. I went through a similar situation about a year ago. I don't have any other family that is not a jw, so I went and stayed with a friend from my part time job. It did wonders being able to think straight without all the jw bulls**t my family threw at me. They thought (and still do) that they were doing what was best for me. Only you know what is best for you. I won't lie and say it is easy. It is bloody hard. Probably the hardest thing you will ever have to go through. My family have now disowned me and treat me as if I am dead. They think that I just wanted to leave to sleep around, do drugs etc. Couldn't have been further from the truth! If they just listened...but they didn't. They had their own pre-conceived ideas and weren't willing to hear otherwise. I don't know what the situation is in your country, but we are lucky enough here to be able to get a welfare payment to help us leave home due to religious intolerance. I got mine when I was 16 and a bit. It's not enough to live on, but combined with an after school job, you can get by. By doing this, I got peace and freedom. It's not for everyone, it makes you grow up fast, but I wouldn't have it any other way. As for being on my own, I now have alot of friends that are much better than any I had as a jw. I am finally accepted for who I am, and not condemned for what I do or don't do.

penny2

(((thebiggestlie)))

TBL, you didn't fail. You've been pushed into a corner. You are a talented and intelligent human being. Your parents are upset that you've started thinking for yourself. You're not a robot.

TBL, we're thinking of you. Take care, and this will all pass.

Love

penny2

Round 2 disastor

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