When is it 'going too far'?

by nekone041 35 Replies latest social relationships

  • nekone041
    nekone041

    Thank you all very much for the replies!

    @RAF - I'm going to try my hardest to read and understand the Bible on my own. I'll try and stick around to ask other's opinions on scriptures I don't quite understand.

    @Nosferatu - That was a big help. I think I gave you the wrong idea about condoms, though. I meant, I have no need for condoms right now. I know that, in the future, I'll be using them to prevent STDs and a pregnancy (and, if I marry my current gf, she'll be using the pill, as neither of us really want her to be pregnant). I'm pretty educated in that matter. As for the passionate stuff, I'll try to talk to her about that. However, I think it's more her conscience that is stopping us from doing those simple things.

    @Darth frosty - I know I may sound REALLY naive saying this (and I'm sure you're thinking "He's 17, every teenager says this), but I may not need to break up with her. In fact, we have no intention of breaking up. We believe in working out our problems instead of breaking up over them. We've yet to run into a problem that is big enough to break up over. Oh, and I've been planning out my life, too. Or, at least, what I want it to be. xP

    @SirNose586 - Thanks for the welcome! There's a lot I've noticed in differences between churches and the kingdom hall. For one, at churches, no one greets you, or really cares about you for that matter. At the hall, I noticed that everyone is friendly and cares about each other. Secondly, I never truly understood how doctrines like the trinity and hell agree with what churches taught. In fact, they seemed more hypocrytical. What the hall taught made more sense to me.

  • BrentR
    BrentR

    Originally posted by Nosferatu:

    "Condoms not only prevent sexually transmitted diseases, they prevent child birth."

    My wife and I were under that impression also until something un-expected happened. Her name is Jessica and she just turned eight a few weeks ago. Apparently there are a few storks that are now using sophisticated laser guidance in order to defeat latex based ground defenses. You can put a cap over your chimney but a highly trained and experienced stork can still drop a baby down with pinpoint accuracy.

  • Mystla
    Mystla
    At the hall, I noticed that everyone is friendly and cares about each other

    It is, perhaps, a good thing they don't know about your little indiscretion with your gf. You would find them very different if they did. What you are seeing is the show put on for new ones, the love fest that rapidly dwindles once you are commited. I know that sounds harsh, but I have seen it so many times, it's heartbreaking.

    Here are a few links that you might enjoy:

    http://formerjw.homestead.com/exchange.html

    http://www.jwfacts.com/

    http://www.reexamine.org/quotes/

    Welcome to the board, stick around and feel free to ask lots of specific questions about the bible or life in general. There are a lot of scripture savy people here and a lot of wisdom on life from many "older" ones including our very own granny (who will definatly tell you like it is)

    Misty

  • darth frosty
    darth frosty

    Dont get me wrong I did not say you should break up with this girl. I am merely alluding to the fact that changes occur in our lives and how we deal with them is as important as how we enjoy the moment.

  • SirNose586
    SirNose586
    @SirNose586 - Thanks for the welcome! There's a lot I've noticed in differences between churches and the kingdom hall. For one, at churches, no one greets you, or really cares about you for that matter. At the hall, I noticed that everyone is friendly and cares about each other.

    You've found churches which are pretty cold, and you can find churches where the people are warm. There are some born-again members on this board who've discovered loving, Christian churches. JWs are super loving at first, and then when you're a member, it all dies down a bit. Mystla described it correctly.

    If you're looking for a review of churches, try finding a city magazine. I know that SD has one, and in it different churches are reviewed on four different dimensions.

    Secondly, I never truly understood how doctrines like the trinity and hell agree with what churches taught. In fact, they seemed more hypocrytical. What the hall taught made more sense to me.

    The JWs replaced eternal hell with the global slaughter of over 6.5 billion adults, children, and babies. And yet this is from the "God of Love!"

    Instead of a mysterious trinity, the JWs insert Jehovah in the NT in scriptures where "Lord" should have been, and have relegated Jesus to an archangel's position. If you want to come to Jesus for your salvation, you will not be directed to do this as a Witness. You will be taught to come to the organization for salvation. I hear more praise for the leaders in Brooklyn than I do for God or Jesus when I go to the hall.

    In fact, I bet you anything you were never taught the most important scripture in JW theology. I am also willing to bet that you made the same mistake as everyone else who starts studying with the Witnesses....!

  • Honesty
    Honesty
    Thanks for the welcome! There's a lot I've noticed in differences between churches and the kingdom hall. For one, at churches, no one greets you, or really cares about you for that matter.

    If you live near the Great Smoky Mountains National Park and East Tennessee I will invite you to a couple of churches around here that have people who really love Jesus and all people, not just those that agree with them.

    I hope you find out the history and truth about the Watchtower Society before you spend your entire life chasing a concept.

    Have a great weekend,

    Bob

  • Qcmbr
    Qcmbr

    Take the time to focus on other parts of your relationship before you get too physical. The problem with being physical if you haven't got much experience is that its hard to draw a line in the sand and say how far you can go. My first kiss was somewhat spoiled for me because I got tongued to death and didn't get a chance to experience regular kissing first. Its the same with sex or any of its precursors - with no firm boundaries you may end up further than you planned or in the end want. One of the things I'm happiest about is that I waited until I was married but it was a close run thing on several occassions which I wish hadn't happened. You'll get a lot of advice on this board but since most don't hold to the morals you've chosen anymore you'll end up maybe with different advice than you were expecting.

    Use the time to enjoy finding out about your friendship. Don't sweat the sexual stuff just yet, you have time on your side and you'll make better choices the more in control you are. That's my thoughts anyway.

  • inactive in jersey
    inactive in jersey

    hi, years ago i asked an elder that question. he said anything that insights desire. it does not sound like your baptized yet. whatever you do or don't do don't tell anyone in the hall not even friends. the last thing you need is everyone knowing and that is what would happen. pray about it if you feel guilty. it is really cool that you are waiting to have intercourse til marriage. i wasn't pure in other ways but waited to have intercourse until marriage.

  • pixel
    pixel

    I don't think he is a JW. I mean, he just got into it last year. I guess he is a student. Now, if the lady is a JW, I guess she IS in trouble...

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    nekeone,

    Please do not allow this organization to sexually repress you!!! Your life (sexual life) will be greatly inhibited by this orgainzation if you allow it. Make these decisions based on your own consious and do not allow others to determine what is best for you!!!!

    Keep in mind that this organization will run (or ruin) your entire life, from educational opportunities to how you raise your children. Don't worry so much about sinning, check your decision to be a JW now while you still have some brain cells in tact!!!

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