The strangest looking (and acting) nut jobs you have ever seen at the KH!

by new boy 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • strymeckirules
    strymeckirules

    sister weight.

    she had a amazing singing ability for some reason, but she was autistic, so her timing was HORRIBLE! she could throw off the whole audience during the song! FUNNY!

    during the opening prayer, she would often break into tears sobbing.

    that would wierd me out during a prayer.

    and then the one time a visiting native person with long hair was sitting in the back row, and the public talk speaker was sensationalizing world events.

    the speaker said something about "CRACK COCAINE" and the native stood up and started walking towards the stage shouting

    "where does it say that in the bible?" in a drunken mumble.

    brothers immediatly escorted him outside physically.

  • watersprout
    watersprout

    In the cong we were in there was this one bro who was very strange. His wife was an identical twin and she would refuse to sit next to her hubby, making her twin sit next to him. Anyway one meeting Carrot and I were skivving in the foyer, this bro came in through the doors having done the ''carpark check''. He walked up to Carrot got in real close and stroked Carrots face. Carrot froze, i couldn't help myself and i started to giggle. As he walked out Carrot looked at me and shuddered! This same bro was on mikes and my parents were sat on the back row. While the paragraphs were being read he walked up behind my mom and pushed his ''willy'' into her back. Mom kept turning round and huffing and tried to move away. That made him worse! After the meeting he went up to mom and apologised that the reason he had to stand so close was because he didn't want to get in the way of the video camera. WTF! He is a dirty perv!

    Peace

  • Hairyhegoat
    Hairyhegoat

    Watersrout

    We had a bro like this in our old cong, he was a perv and we called him dougy fresh. He looked just like eddie hitler from the tv programe bottom.

    He was always eyeing up sleeping beauty and saying if he were 20 years younger then I would have had no chance with her.

    HHG

  • watersprout
    watersprout

    Oh no HHG! I think all the fruits in the UK were in our area! The cong we were in was well known for the sheer amount of ''fruit loops''. The pioneers and elders familys would make up names and mock them. I love how SB would have a choice in the matter! LMAO!

    Peace

  • Hairyhegoat
    Hairyhegoat

    Watersprout we are going to have a party soon up at our house in Tamworth UK. You are more than welcome to attend if you want. Let us know if you want to as the house is big enough to host 20/30 ex jw's and if you have contacts in your area they can gome over too, kids are not a problem as we have a few of our own.

    Take care HHG

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    My mom:(

    She'd put a KM on her head to shade her eyes from the lights.

    Neon pink brief case

    Stroller carries her purse as it's too heavy for her to carry.

    One crutch.

    Huge sunglasses with neon pink frames.

    A sneeze that makes the speaker jump and others titter.

    Laughs at others, speaker, and herself outloud during meetings.

    Crochetes at assemblies in deaf section (distracting arm movements to bring the yarn up)

    Oh gosh, what else?

    Arrives late and looks and smiles at everyone as she is getting her seat.

    Talks low but uses voice.

    Has a very loud voice and will say the most embarrassing things to people.

    Well, if she or anyone who knows her reads this, I'm toast.

    Edit to add: Sprays water on herself (gets rest of people by her wet, too) at meetings and assemblies cuz she's too hot. "It's just water. Don't be so sensitive!"

  • watersprout
    watersprout

    HHG thats sound good. Thanks for the invite. Pm me the details when you have them.

    Peace

  • hirotaka
    hirotaka

    Old Mister Dead Sea Scrolls

    This poor skinny old guy.......must have been in his 90's used to come sit toward the back quietly for most of the meeting.

    Then all of a sudden he would stand up waving his arm in the air yelling something about the speaker now having 'checked the dead sea scrolls' as if the speaker would should have consulted the scrolls before making up his outline. ususally got physically escorted out of the hall.

    Another was a P Schizo who was convinced that the police had followed him to the K Hall and kept checking over his shoulder all meeting long looking for the cops.

    Another was Bev.........who used to cut her own hair before every meeting......until she had only tufts of hair all over her head.

    h

  • Low-Key Lysmith
    Low-Key Lysmith

    There was a teenager that would bring a ventriloquist dummy with him to all of the meetings until he was asked to stop. This same kid loved to wear cowboy boots to the hall and had a terrible habit of stomping on peoples' feet "as a joke". Yeah. Real funny.

    When I was really young, there was a woman at the hall that was the poster child for awkward computer geeks. She had stringy, greasy hair, coke bottle glasses, etc. She had a nervous habit of rocking back and forth endlessly throughout the meetings. Her worst problem though, was that she would just lean over, lift a buttcheek, and loudly fart whenever the need arose. To her credit, she would always say "excuse me", as if that made it OK. Needless to say, there was always a perimeter of empty seats around her because no one wanted to endure her farting and BO. Her last name was Saggendorf, too. No joke.

    We had a nazi elder named Joe Lewis. His young son was was just as much of a jackass as he was. he named the kid Little Joe Lewis. Seriously, his first name as written on his birth certificate was "Little". You were not allowed to call him "LJ", either. He demanded to be addressed as "Little Joe".

    There was a funny older woman that loved to comment at the WT study, but she would always hold the mic up to her ear instead of her mouth when making comments.

  • aquagirl
    aquagirl

    I LOVE the parakeet woman story!!!We never had anyone even remotely interesting.

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