What emotions were you feeling as you started reading the posts on JWD?

by What-A-Coincidence 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • What-A-Coincidence
    What-A-Coincidence

    My reaction: Shock and awe (TM). I was an elder and had just left Bethel. I didn't want to believe what I was reading especially from current and former Elders. I went into a depressed and suicidal state. But thankfully it didn't last long.

  • lost_light06
    lost_light06

    I remeber shaking, physicaaly shaking. I also felt sick to my stomach. I would read a post then quickly close my browser because I wasn't supposed to be reading it. Within 2 minutes I was reading more posts. My head was swimming. Thankfully I kept reading and researching because now I'm out and it's because, in part, of this forum.

  • anewme
    anewme

    I couldnt believe it! It was like finding long lost family! It was like discovering my twin!
    The many posts I read spoke directly to my heart!


    I was in shock for days afterwards. And I was hooked.



  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I don't remember the particular thread, but I linked from freeminds.org.
    I left that thread and went to the homepage and linked around.

    It was close to the "kid in a candy store" feeling. I already knew there
    was anti-JW stuff out there. This is the mother-load. WOW.
    I lurked for months, read quite a bit occasionally. I had to join in a
    discussion on Bethel layoffs, but I was worried about registering. I still
    have some paranoia about getting caught, but I would get over it.

    I thought I could cut back on JWD, but because I still interact with the
    congregation, I need my fix. I get on here way too much.

  • What-A-Coincidence
    What-A-Coincidence
    I would read a post then quickly close my browser because I wasn't supposed to be reading it. Within 2 minutes I was reading more posts

    Me to! I would lie down and try to ask for forgiveness fom the god of the JWs...which is a dual god "FEAR and GUILT". Then I said, I will look again, he has to forgive me anyway.

  • carla
    carla

    I'm astonished that any of you are here and believe any of the stories told! My jw keeps toting the pary line, 'all lies', 'sourgrapes', 'can't live up to...' , you know the list.

  • Tyrone van leyen
    Tyrone van leyen

    For me it's a roller coaster of guilt, sometimes nervous apprehension if I don't understand somebodies intentions and a nice feeling of connectedness with what we all have in common. Sometimes I have to walk away from it though. Too much sometimes. A lot to face. Sometimes anger too. With all those emotions It's amazing I can make a sane comment.

  • love2Bworldly
    love2Bworldly

    I felt shocked as I learned how evil the WBTS really is and how unkind most of the elders really are, and that many people get disfellowshipped who want forgiveness and are repentant.

  • Mystla
    Mystla

    I was shaking and nauseated.. I kept reading, though. I had sweat running down my sides.. a complete panic reaction. The more I read the more anger I felt for being so decieved. Then I felt stupid for having bought into jw crap all my life. Then I began to feel justified for leaving.. and began to accept that I had been duped, but so had others and they survived it and so could I.

    I think these are all things I would have worked through without JWD.. this site just made it easier and faster, months instead of years. Now I come here mostly because of family related stuff that I still need to get past.

    Misty

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    When I first started reading jwd, I had already been out of the org for 23 years so I found the post very entertaining.

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