Any tips on successfully fading?

by unhappy 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • daniel-p

    I would go with your medical issues. That has been the strongest defense for "doing what you have to do" that I have seen.

  • sspo

    How about people-phobia, panic attacks when you are among people.

    There is a good account in Kings or chronicles when King David ran away from Saul and lived among the Philistines and he would foam from his mouth and played retarded.

    Try that, no one will want to be around you and probably reccomend you stay home.

  • Dagney

    I agree with everybody's post.

    Mention anything "female" issues, and they are bound to leave you alone. Whatever family or health issues you have, use it to the extent you can. Eventually, they will just write you off.

    Then move if you start.

  • moshe

    I read that you are having some major surgery soon. That is your ticket out. Let them know how bad it will be and the help you will need After the surgery, you must become a very needy person, all kinds of help- meals delivered, shopping, cleaning , errands, etc.-- to the point that they dread getting a phone call. Witnesses hate taking care of others- they want everyone to be like an Alaskan sled dog. Pull your load like everyone else and , IF you get too weak/sick to do it, they cut your harness and leave you by the side of the trail. If you can get them sick of the new "needy" you, they will be happy to see you fade. Anytime one of them calls have a list of things you need done by them. I guarantee the calls/visits will stop.

  • unhappy

    Yes my surgery should be in a coupla months, I think this could be my get out of jail card.

  • hillbilly

    Moving without a forwarding adress works well... sounds like maybe you need to move for your "health".... I found that moving to a larger town while active let me hide in plain view for a long time. City witnesses are pretty self-abosorbed and too busy to mess with you if they don't know you well. The small town I came up in ...they and everyone else knew everything about one's business.


  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Just a few questions. There are thousands of posters here. With a wider understanding [not enough to give away your ID understand], they might be able to aid you through this process better.

    What age group are you in? retired? single? work or not? can you move? how far? how much family is in the org? support by others in your family? how prominent is your family? will they track you down should you move? or leave you alone?

    You get the idea. The advice might be more specific if we had some details of your situation.


  • unhappy

    Ok, I'm in my early twenties, don't work due to poor health, family is in truth, very prominent in cong. I have support from one member of my family. I wouldn't be able to move away at the moment, as am due to have surgery soon. I live very close to lots of dubs whch makes it a bit difficult.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Ok - you have gotta' lay in a plan to eventually move, if possible. All the connections will eventually trip you up methinks. But, the surgery and the health issues can be crutched well to start a good fade, as suggested.

    Then start to build a plan that will move you away from the area, and in the new area just never register with the new sales club [congo]. If they force that issue - by contacting the local elders and forwarding your card - then, since unknown in that area, just slip away to a new address.

    The only catch is the jw relatives as I see it - who will most likely find you and try to 'pin you down' regarding your 'spritual health' and association. If you know they are coming - no prob - you can play the game. So distance might be the key.

    Just my opinion


  • pobthespazz

    Easy really , this is what i did , start missing a lot of meetings and quit answering during the first month, then start not turning up for your talks, stop going to the book study at all, you will be deleted from it, then start going home after the public talk don't stay for the WT study. Slowly stop going to the Thursday meeting ,report minimum hours for the next 3 months and then stop reporting, do not accept any visits by elders, and hey presto you will be faded!

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