Its a website that is something like "Ask a circuit overseer" instead of "Dear Abby". This just one portion just broke my heart. It is all pretty sad actually. http://www.dbhome.dk/carlo/607.html Dear CO:
My 20 year old daughter was recently disfellowshipped for fornication (she got pregnant and isn't married). My husband and I have completely cut her off, thrown her out of the house, refused to help with any financial or emotional support, and won't speak to her, just as the elders have counseled. When the baby is born, we want to be able to see it and of course, bring it into The Truth. However, our daughter is very angry and is totally unrepentant, and has even been exhibiting some apostate attitudes.
She just can't see how much she is hurting us.
My question is would it be considered "theocratic warfare" to get custody of the baby once it is born? She obviously will be an unfit mother, condemning her own baby to death by turning her back on Jehovah's organization. I am hesitant to ask our own congregation elders about this matter because since my daughter's disfellowshipping it seems that many in the congregation have been keeping their distance from my husband and myself. I am hoping that if we can get the baby into the truth we will be back in the good graces of the congregation once again.
Signed, Sister Goodmother
Dear Sister,
as your elders have so wisely counseled you, you should continue to shun your daugher. This is the most loving thing you can do for her in this situation. The Watchtower warns us that parents can have only limited contact with disfellowshipped adult children for "family emergencies or urgent family business" and to visit grandchildren. Now, it is up to your own conscience as to what you personally consider to be family business.
I know of one elder who considered summer vacations family business and invited all three of his disfellowshipped children and their families to spend two weeks in a rented cabin on the lake. However, he did follow the guidelines of "not eatting with such a person", therefore he ate his meals in a separate room. Considering that you want to show your congregation that you are spiritually strong, I would advise you to follow the guidelines from the faithful and discreet slave to the letter, avoiding all contact whatsoever. There is no reason you ever have to see this baby at all. I know many many parents who have disfellowshipped children and these children have gone on to have families and the faithful parents have never even seen these grandchildren. What strong examples of trusting in Jehovah and his appointed organization we can see before us!If you want to get back in the good graces of your congregation, you must show how spiritually strong you are. Have you considered pioneering? Now that your daugher is out of the house, you and your husband should have more time for service. Perhaps you could both pioneer. This would truly make Jehovah happy.