by dawgfan 41 Replies latest jw friends
Welcome Dawg! You can hang out with us here, you're always a welcome friend! (If you feel comfotable answering) Whereabouts do you live? Do you have any friends to help you through this? If not, many of us have been through similar situations, so fee welcome here, it will really help you, I promise.
Captain of The Black Pearl,
Jack Sparrow
thanks again CS 101: You are right - everything I have read from here would've convinced me before I started a relationship that it would be inevitable. That's one reason I've decided to break "silence" on here, other boards I'm on, and in my life. I've read stories of others seeking advice or at the "beginning" stages of where I once was and said nothing. I think I feel morally obligated now to speak up and paint the picture of how things really work.
Me thinks she is not putting Jehovah 'first' but rather an organization. Jehovah counsels to stay with a so-called 'unbeliever' as the correct way to handle a situation like yours.
Outaservice (very happy with wife #2, an ex-JW)
Welcome dawgfan!
What a sad story. It is so terrible that an organization can tear apart a marriage like that, yet as we see it seems to happen on a regular basis. I wish you all the best-things will get better over time, and hope you find some sense of "healing" here. There are alot of great people on this board(as I'm sure you already know).
Take care of yourself
LIG
Welcome Dawgfan.
Can you tell the crowd here, What do you need help with (besides moral support)?
Do you want to try to help your wife out of the organization, or perhaps help her see why
JW's aren't allowed to divorce faithful spouses?
Do you want advice on the divorce itself?
Feel free to share whatever you want, but there are some great people here who are
ready to share their opinions for free.
dawgfan, welcome to the board. I'm truly sorry to hear your story.
I do want to point out that your wife is not a particularly good Witness. She was breaking the rules when she married you; and believe it or not, she's also breaking the rules when she leaves you, too. The Witnesses encourage people in mixed marriages to tough it out--they quote scripture implying that by being good spouses, these Witnesses can win their unbelieving mates over to the religion. People who pull this off are often held up as examples.
So while it's heartbreaking to hear your story, I don't think it's accurate for anyone to characterize it as the Watchtower Society splitting your marriage up. As Garybuss says, it's a marital problem, not a religious one.
I hate the way the Watchtower breaks up families; how it makes your own flesh and blood think that they are better than you are. It is a very painful thing to go through. I remember when my girls started acting like they were so good. They stopped watching movies with us. That was only the beginning of the Watchtower's hold on them. It seems like I don't even know who my girls are anymore.
I'm wishing you the best for your marriage, Dawgfan. Hopefully, your wife will learn that she needs you more than the organization. These situations are always hard.
How could she just divorce? According to the JW thinking only adultery gives a valid reason for divorce. Your story shows that it's hard for JWs and non JWs to intermarry especially since the JWs expect their non JW spouses to die soon at armageddon, what a grim outlook for a marriage.
DawgFan...Welcome, and I am so sorry about your marraige. You will find alot of support here!
mama
Welcome--sorry about your marriage. I am surprised as a JW that she is basically walking out on a marriage without good reason--her elders would counsel her against that usually.
You have to understand her mindset though--she is brain-washed & belongs to a cult that basically teaches you to be cut off from family & friends. I believe that is the true basis of why they don't celebrate holidays and many other things.
Wish you luck!
