I hope to read more of your posts soon! I'm glad you have escaped the craziness that is JW land.
Anyway, I need to cut to the chase here so I hope you don't think I'm rude if I'm direct and blunt about the experience of some JWs who want to leave but can't completely and mentally, such as your husband.
It seems you may well be a few steps ahead of him in leaving but he is in that dangerous stage. He is in the stage where he still believes what the WTBTS says about ALL the people in the world who are NOT JWs.
He has tattoos, he smokes, he wants to go to strip clubs, he's talking about smoking pot.....yeah and......is that what ALL non JWs do. Is that clever?
Is his plan to go from being a brain dead dub to being a brain dead ex dub, as the Society paints all non JWs or is he going to wake up and see the world for what it really is. The vast majority of people in the world are moral, upstanding, caring people. Does he really believe that leaving dub land means he has to act like an idiot? Is there any chance he can get his brain into gear and discover the truth about the world at large and that it isnt all the way the Watchtower paints it.
Does he believe everybody has to behave in a foolish way to be counted a non JW or can he not see that ....well I think you get what I'm trying to say to you?
I'll give you one more example. My Sister left JW land and went out with her friends a few months ago. After a few drinks they all decided to 'Moon' in the street at a group of men. Well, they went to 'Moon' but the only one who really did was my sister. The others were shocked at her behaviour, but she believed that ALL, (here I'm not saying that none do) but she believed all non JWs behaved like idiots every where they went.
One more example. My son's ex girlfriend is a JW elders daughter. Her family are true fanatics. The sister of this girl and her husband allowed my son and his girlfriend to sleep together at their house after going clubbing on thursday evenings. The brother in Law is a MS has tatoos, smokes and is a fanatical nut JW by the way. Go figure these idiots out. Considering what he knew about them, my son thought nothing of saying that the WTBTS was nothing but a bunch of charlatans and just a book publishing company. For his pains he was screamed at, thumped and thrown out of the house. Those idiots believe that the WTBTS is The Truth!!!! They think they are behaving normally, because starting fights in bars, tatooing your arse cos that's the only part people can't see at the KH, having piercings of their nether regions, cos no one at the hall will know, but they believe EVERYONE non JW behaves in such a outlandish manner.
Certainly the WTBTS twists and corrupts peoples minds.
Finally, for both of you, research, research, research on everything you can about the history of the WTBTS and take it from there.
I hope your poor husband wakes from his strange attitudes soon and learns more respect for the people in the world, because he may just be hanging around with the 'wrong bunch'!
I wish you well! But the answer to this is in both your hands and you can only find real truths about anything by reading and researching. You have my sympathys as I too was a total moron brain dead, brain washed JW. It's taken me four years to really understand the WTBTS and I wish you the best in your attempts to escape its grip completely!