family disowning you!!

by awol 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • awol
    awol

    Funny though, cos when all the s..t hit the fan, he came driving to me all drunk and tearfull and I councilled him! (I have NEVER had a relationship with him in the 13 yrs they have been together!). I also told my sis off and said I'd support her in whatever she wanted to do, BUT she mustn't carry on like this behind his back, and mustn't hurt him! Now, I have made mistakes, but I am a very loyal, honest and moral person. I don't wanna see anyone hurt and I didn't think he should be lied and cheated on. But, because I was baptised (too young and not of my own decision) I am the baddy!!! eh? I was always open to hear whatever news came from the organisation after assemblies whether or not I agreed, but I would listen and not pooh pooh it! My best freind pioneers a few times a month and she has studies she tells me all about. I listen, and would NEVER ever dis her beliefs. She is intellegent and old enough to decide.

    All I am saying here is "HOW THE HELL WILL I OR ANYONE ELSE IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS REALLY affect their thoughts?" No one will change my mind on my thinking..... but I'm open to debate!

    She will see sense and she will ring me and I will be here for her too.

  • jwfacts
    jwfacts

    Very sorry to hear about your situation.

    Brother In Laws seem to be very good at attempting to manipulate their wives, maybe it is the ego trip that the WTS gives them as the Head of the House.

    I have several friends where the wife wants to associate with family but the husband will not let them. This week I found out that a few years ago a friend of mine turned up to the engagement party of one of her best friends. The groom would not let her in as she was not baptised, and never even told his finance that her friend had turned up and been refused entry.

  • bubble
    bubble

    Welcome Awol. This is an awful situation you're in. I hope your sister makes a stand against this horrible man and leaves him. I think if she meets the right person and falls in love, that will be her get out from the marriage and the religion. Sounds like this could be a strong possibility considering her 2 'misdemeanours'.

  • unique1
    unique1

    Welcome AWOL. Many of us here, including myself, feel your pain. Shunning is completely nonsensical. It never helps anyone, only harms, but they can't see that. They are blind. I hope for the kids sake this all works out. Best wishes.

  • Dismembered
    Dismembered

    Greetings awol

    Just to help you reassure you in your thinking. Your BIL is a typical watchtower dickhead. Shame on your sister who's infected with the same brain-dead watchtower virus. Especially where she has children.

    Dismembered

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    Welcome awol, the obsession of JWs with Armageddon and destruction makes them sound like fringe lunatics with an axe to grind, they have to be very important for their god to destroy all those refusing to join and obey them.

    In fact they are just a minor albeit vocal cult that understands very little about the nature of God and how He deals with mankind.

  • Fleur
    Fleur

    Welcome, awol! You are definitely not alone, and I do understand.

    My sister cut me off after her Elder husband insisted and wore her down over it and I think that he was threatened that he'd lose his position of she kept associating with me. So she has done the true JW thing and gone totally overboard and now shuns my parents because they still speak to me (they are older now and my husband and I are the only ones of their kids that they can count on for anything!)

    I am so sorry that you are going through this too :(

    hugs

    essie

  • Lady Liberty
    Lady Liberty

    Dear AWOL,

    WELCOME to the forum!! I am so very sorry that you are going through what you are! It is so painful!! My brother has totally disowned the rest of his family. He just had a baby and so now that makes two children that will never know their grandparents, or aunts and uncles and cousins. It is SICK!! Hang in there! We are glad to have you here!

    Sincerely,

    Lady Liberty

  • solo
    solo

    I really think that some jws use shunning as a way of controling their wives or getting one over on their families

    the experiences here sound similar to how my brother has behaved, he has always been jealous of my other brother and me and has, for as long as I can remember, tried to make trouble for us not just with our parents but with the elders. Since we have both left and he has stayed he has enforced the shunning policy with all his might and tried to get our parents to do the same, they did for about 5 years but then came round. So now he is shunning his JW parents because they won't shun us! What sort of f***** up person is he?

    So now my parents never see him or their grand children and he never sees any of us - what a loving family orientated religion!

  • banished1
    banished1

    AWOL, as painful as this situation is....many of us have been through it and have survived.
    Just plan to be there for your sis.
    Meantime tell her you love her and are always there for her.
    And go ahead and tell your nieces and nephews that you love them dearly too.

    Such $h*t because of all that religious gobbledygoop!

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