You know when you have those moments that you forget everyone that cares about you? Well I was having one of those
I hate to admit this, but I have found time and time again that the only people who seem to really CARE about those of us who are former (and hurting) JWs.....are folks like the ones on these boards. No one else can understand all the complexities and emotions tied into what we have come to accepting. No one else (except for other exJWs) can even come close to appreciating all the stuff we are dealing with.
When I first began my lonely and painful journey "out"....I was totally alone in this. I never even told my hubby what I had discovered and uncovered online on many nights at three o'clock in the morning. As I grew stronger in my convictions and had decided what the hell I was going to "do" with my findings....I used to feel so bad when I realized that after 30 years of JW friendships.....at that point in time.....that now I had only a relatively few friends from a forum like this one. I knew that I couldn't "talk to" anyone of my "JW only" friends, and I knew that once I had taken the necessary steps to make things right in my life---that I would have "zero" friends anyway!
Those on the forum had seen my transformation, from first posting as a WTS defender---to seeing me AWAKE! UP and see just what I had been duped into following so loyally. They watched the entire process unfold, and helped me to deal with present problems, let me vent and cry to my heart's content, and most of all----they were THERE for me at any time of the day or night.
Having said this, I do understand the need to separate yourself from the reality of life away from the computer, but as much as I understand the concept, I have yet to reach that point myself, LOL! I owe so much to the kindred souls that have offered me an arm to grab for support, and a shoulder to cry on while trying to steady myself.
Even recently, this reality of "who is there for me when needed" was proven to me once again, and it wasn't (isn't) the people in my private life as you would expect! Once again.....it was the warm and caring folks here and on another forum that I regularly post at. As I said----time and time again, these are the ones who are there to offer whatever they can, whenever they can, and God bless them for all the emotional support that has been given to me.
I'm SO glad you decided to stick around.