Lying about going to meetings...what are your thoughts?

by stillAwitness 28 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Wolfgirl
    Wolfgirl

    My uncle got DF'd for lying about going to the KH when he wasn't. He told his mother he was going to a different cong, and when he got found out, they DF'd him.

  • 95stormfront
    95stormfront
    If you don't want to go to the meetings then don't. You do not need to answer to anyone. The only reason you feel you need to do as your mother says is that you want her to bail you out financially. Get another job. You've got no kids or responsibilities. Extra work will not hurt you.

    Bingo!!!!

    You're a grown, rent and tax paying individual.

    I had the pleasure of watching one of my nephews stand up to his overbearing JW dad, mom, and sister this weekend. They came into his house, a house he just bought with his now pregnant girlfriend, and tried to dictate to him when he'd be able to watch an extremely violent movie he was interested in seeing.

    In the end, they all got pissed off because they couldn't have their way and left. The father was rolling his eyes all the way out of the house.

    I can't tell you all how proud I was of him for standing his ground as the "MAN" of his house.

  • collegegirl21
    collegegirl21

    StillA -
    you know I am in the same predicament you are in, except my mother is threatening to take my car away and its hard living in a small town of like 9,000 to find a local job to pay my rent and pay for school. So I think she knows that she is slowly breaking me. As for me, I lie and tell her that I am going to the meetings, but eventually I am going to tell her the truth, I'm just not sure when the right time will be. Good luck with everything... it does feel nice paying your own rent, doesn't it? :) Yeah... I thought so!

    ~CG21

  • jayhawk1
    jayhawk1

    Stillawitness,

    I am going to agree with those who say you have some growing up to do. Cut the strings, and quit accepting money from your mom. That's your first mistake. Living with your boyfriend is mistake number two. Your parents are going to give you all sorts of trouble if they find out. Plus you are so young, you are still trying to figure out who you are. There may be money in being a waitress, but what is your long term goals? Do you forsee yourself making a career out of waitressing or do you have bigger plans? If you have no concrete plans, that's mistake number three. What is your boyfriend's career goals? Is he going through college, or has he finished college? If he has done neither, does he have a future in mind? Finally, whatever you do, don't get pregnant anytime soon! You don't want that mistake, because that is a mistake that keeps on giving.

    Listen, I don't know you and it is a cruel world if you let it be. You are young enough to make it a great life or a miserable one. Minor problems you create today can become major headaches in the future. I think based on what you have just asked, you have bigger dilemmas than lying about going to a few JW meetings.

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    The landlord will probably "forgive" $35 of being short on rent, especially if you give it to him/her next week. It would cost him at least that much in lawyers/filing fees to file an eviction complaint at the local courthouse. So, I really do not think he/she is going to mind being a dollar or two short on rent.

    Your mother will not forgive you lying to her about your heart. Plus, I think your mother will hold the $30 loan over your head more than your landlord.

    Skeeter

  • liquidsky
    liquidsky

    Stilla,

    You said:

    I love being on my own although my mom still tries to at least get me going to meetings again.

    So your mom is trying to get you to go to the meetings again, even though she thinks your're going to another hall because you've lied to her and told her you are. That makes alot of sense.

    And why are you so concerend about lying? You're lying about living with your boyfriend, so what's the big deal?

  • Balsam
    Balsam


    Don't lie, use your job as an excuse to not make meetings. As for your bf living with you, your parents will find out one day and the poop will hit the fan. The anxiety it causes as you try to dodge your parents questions will drive you crazy. Just avoid such questions about meetings, or questions you don't want to answer. But don't lie. You can just say "MOM I will take of it have a little patience." I feel for you but your going to do fine once you both get on your feet. Make sure you pay your folks back, because they will be livid if they feel they contributed money toward you living immorally from their standpoint. Pay them back pronto. Get an extra job if you need to, your bf can do the same thing, you can make it.

    Good luck girl,

    Ruth

  • atypical
    atypical

    I personally refuse to lie to my parents or anyone who pressures me about leaving the witness life. That is not to say that I give any more info than I want to, but I won't lie because to me that would imply that I feel I am doing something wrong. I do not feel I am doing something wrong by walking away from the org, and so I refuse to lie about it.

  • 95stormfront
    95stormfront

    Isn't these the two people who decided that it was time for you to pack your bags and even gave you a deadline as to when they wanted you out of their house? And now, just because they're in a position to toss a few dollars your way in yout time of need, both they and you are still under the expectation that you have to answer to each other?

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