Are JW's cold people?

by JH 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • kls
    kls
    I would have loved to hug a sister.

    Well , the next time you see your sister , give her a hug and all is well.

  • SirNose586
    SirNose586
    I remember a strict elder in my congregation many years ago telling brothers not to shake the hands of sisters, now I don't recall if it was for single brothers and sisters or to everyone.

    It was as if they were telling us plainly, "why make physical contact with the other sex"?

    There's got to be something wrong here. Why is it that certain elders just seem so...Hasidic? Not to knock Hasidic Jews or anything. It's just so strange and outdated what some of these elders believe.

  • Honesty
    Honesty

    Frigid.

    I usually get and give at least 4 or 5 hugs from kids of all ages (2-95) at church every Sunday.

    Too much "temptation" for hugs at the KH I guess.

  • Arthur
    Arthur

    I think part of this is the Witnesses social conditioning, and part of it is cultural. One thing that I learned from others who lived abroad, is that some other countries like Japan and other places, it is very taboo to hug a sister for any reasons. I saw a wide variation in the forms of affection that people gave. I noticed that some people are just more affectionate than others.

    I think that a huge factor is that most Witnesses don't believe in close plutonic friendships between the opposite sexes. I have noticed amoung many of the "worldly" people that I know, that men and women can hug and kiss each other on the cheek routinely without even thinking about it. I know many men and women friends who will peck each other on the lips without meaning anything romantic, as if it's nothing. To them, there is nothing abnormal about it. This was somewhat of a culture shock to me, as I had never seen Witnesses do this sort of thing. But, I am learning to be more open and affectionate with others, which I think is really nice.

  • Highlander
    Highlander

    Don't you all know that a hug or kiss can lead to impromptu wild sex parties on the floor of the kingdom hall?

  • buffalosrfree
    buffalosrfree

    American congregations that is white people are very cold in my estimation, it has been my experience when dealing with other cultures, that they are more warm hearted than the run of the mill american congregation (which exhibits all the warmth of an iceberg). jesus said you will know his followers from the love they have among themselves. Well you won't find them in the U.S. or other white congregations. They are very conditional in the exhibitions of love.

  • vitty
    vitty

    I really hated all that hugging, it made me feel uncomfortable. I think it was because I knew it was insincere

  • SirNose586
    SirNose586
    I think part of this is the Witnesses social conditioning, and part of it is cultural. One thing that I learned from others who lived abroad, is that some other countries like Japan and other places, it is very taboo to hug a sister for any reasons.

    As I understand it, a hug is equivalent to a kiss in Japanese culture. So I was happy to get some nice big hugs from visiting Japanese hotties.

    I got a question for my limeys out there. You see, I was told that the British congregations were the most cold out there. As in, they might not say hello to you at all. How's the warmth there in those jolly old British congregations? Might that be the case in more conservative, wealthy parts of Britain?

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    I think it depends on their general cultural background in the UK they tend to be cold but in some other countries they may be warmer, the JWs don't change that much from their native culture.

  • Alligator Wisdom
    Alligator Wisdom

    I know of several sisters who not only hesitated to shake hands with me, but we even did "high-fives". Does that seems odd to anyone? By the way, I have been married for over several years and these sisters were either married or single. Sometimes hugs were given, provided that the circumstances was a solemn one.

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