my story

by jaberwalkie 39 Replies latest jw friends

  • Lady Liberty
    Lady Liberty

    Dear Jaberwalkie,

    WELCOME!!!We are so glad you are here. I am sure you will find much needed support and understanding here as there are many here who have been through something simular. It is unbelieveble that a organization that is supposed to be identified by love would think thie worst of their brother. Trying to undue rumors and lies are like trying to stop a freight train. And even if you could possibly clear it up and everyone knew the real truth about the situation, no one would really want to believe it anyway, for it would be much more interesting and "juicy" to believe the lie! I am so very sorry you have been treated the way you have.Personally my husband and I are in a simular situation. We have been labeled and are now shunned for asking my inlaws about a question we had on 607this was about a year ago. Something that was said in confidence became the talk of the town. Boy do rumors fly!! We have heard from 2 states away lies and slander. If you read some of my posts, you will see what has happened. It is hard to believe that everyone that you "thought" were your friends have turned out to be nothing more than superficial "conditional" friends. I can count on one hand those that have shown any intrest in our family since we stopped going to the meetings. Months before anyone heard anything about us, I can count on one hand the ones that inquired if we were ok or not. And we were very active in the congregation! My had even been a MS. I can't believe yu were sick, and they thought the worst of you! I always said to my husband, I could have some sort of terrible illness, and they wouldn't even know. Only one very elderly not acting elder called. I guess the others were far too busy. I remember years ago I called our PO because my grandmother was very discouraged because of the lack of love, and had threatened not to go back to the meetings ever again. Like the concerned grandaughter that I am, I quuickly called the PO. I told him she needed encouragement, since she was a spiritual "widow". Could he call her or visit her. I was blown away when he told me, " She is a big girl, she knows what she should be doing." Then he praised me and told me how good of an example I was, and to keep it up. That was it!!! He never called her or came by. Some spiritual craig and shelter!! I have concluded, as long as you are visible you are good. But when you start missing meetings, you become guilty and never given the chance to prove innocent. Anyway, I am so very sorry you were so alone! You won't be here!! Hang in there and stick around!

    SIncerely your friend,

    Lady Liberty

  • BlackPearl

    This is truly amazing,...though not the first time this has ever happened. Many of the people that are here, are here for the same reason, abuse by fellow Witnesses and/or elders. Jaberwalkie, to find the answer to your dilema, we must examine whether or not Jesus would approve of how you were treated. That would be the true test of Christianity would it not? Think about the kind and loving way Jesus dealt with people who were sick or dejected, now, did your friends and elders treat you the same way? If the answer is no, then there is a bit of thinking to be done on this subject. Even though we are imperfect humans, it is my feeling that "imperfection" is being used a crutch to make excuses for the actions taken by many. Please don't beat yourself up over this, we're here for you, what has happened to you, has happened to me and many, many more here on this forum. Please feel free to express your feelings here, in time, you will find that you will have made hundreds if not thousands of friends in this forum.

  • Dismembered

    Greetings jaberwalkie,

    Welcome to JWD.

    The feelings you have felt are the feelings 100's of people like yourself have felt. What's happened to you is typical. Read all you can from this board and you will see. It's sad when we put our "stock" in something then kicked in the head when we are down.


  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    Hi Jaberwlkie,

    I'm probably the only person here who doesn't know what ME is.

    Is it Myalgic Encephalomyelitis? (thank google!)

    What are your symptoms and daily experience with it?

    How odd that for comfort you have to turn to us Samaritans...

  • cyberdyne systems 101
    cyberdyne systems 101

    Welcome to the forum and thanks for the good post. Unfortunately you have been judged on the outward signs of your christianity as per the watchtowers rules. Once your meeting attendance and/or field service goes down, your suddenly undesirable to the congregation, your viewed as weak and probably bad association (they are encouraged to keep to the inner most part of the cong.) What you have witnessed here is the true state of love in a JW congregation - its conditional. As horrible as it is to go through this, it has allowed your mind to be jolted into thinking again, and could well be a platform to moving on from them. It can be a difficult transition to move away from them, but a rewarding one. Keep talking here and one suggestion I always make is for people to read the NT all the way through over a couple of weeks in context and see what it really says. Be courageous, and take care

    CS 101

  • Twitch


    Let me take your hat,......

  • Gopher

    Welcome to the discussion board.

    Is ME the same as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome?

    Sometimes even if you haven't done anything worth getting disfellowshipped for, the elders will paint you as an unrepentant wrongdoer. If the congregation elders do not like you or want to help, it seems they will find an excuse to get rid of you. (That's not what the say in the Watchtower , but I've seen it happen and it happened to me.)

    They don't go by their Bible, which speaks of love being the overriding quality of a Christian. If love were the dominant quality of the Watchtower organization, then they wouldn't kick people aside at the time of their greatest need for help or support.

    The best antidote to their harshness is truth. Not their version, but rather the kind of information that helps you to understand exactly what kind of an organization the Watchtower Society is, and how they have treated people who don't toe their line, and how they tend to expect of others what they themselves won't do (sound like the Pharisees?).

    Keep reading this site along with others like for excellent information and accounts about how others came to learn the truth about "the truth".

  • love2Bworldly

    Sorry you are being treated like this by so-called 'friends'. A true friend is there in your time of need. Unfortunately, JWs can only be your friend if you are a regular publisher.

  • Swan

    Welcome J aberwalkie !

  • sspo

    I'm trying to figure out what was the reason for DF?

    Was it for taking sleeping pills? Was it suicide?

    If that's the case,never heard of someone getting Df if for that.

    Did you question it or appeal?

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