I'm going to get out

by Sacchiel 30 Replies latest watchtower bible

• 

  thecarpenter

  The idea of fading away sounds better though, but how can I continue doing this? By avoiding everyone/some?

  Well the idea is to slowly decrease your meeting attendance and field service activity until you totally stop altogether in a year or two. When the elders start to inquire, you don't have to tell them the whole truth. Tell them you are busy with other things (ex: school, work, so on). When others start to avoid you (including the elders), this is a opportunity to see who your friends really are (this maybe a surprising time for you). Those who still talk to you and hang out with you are the ones who are a little more independent minded, and under less control of the elders. Then mention your doubts to them and let them express their doubts to you. Take it one step at a time.

  Also use this time to develop non-witness friends (college campus or high school depending how old you are, various clubs, take a dance class to meet chicks, etc...). Also use this time to develop friendships with non-witness relatives.

  Remember thought, YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL THE ELDERS YOUR TRUE FEELINGS ABOUT THE ORGANIZATION, BE ELUSIVE AND DON'T ARGUE WITH THEM. Anything you tell tell them can and will be used against you in a Judicial Committee. (you should read the horror stories of those who tried to be honest with the elders)

  I sure there are others on the forum who can mention some of their experiences in fading and what they did.

  Good Luck
• 

  Dansk

  Dear Sacchiel,

  We all feel for you because we genuinely KNOW what it's like to want to get out.

  Thecarpenter said:

  Well the idea is to slowly decrease your meeting attendance and field service activity until you totally stop altogether in a year or two.

  Unfortunately, if you're like I was, I couldn't go on another day let alone a year or two! Fading does, generally, mean doing things s-l-o-w-l-y but if you feel you must stop now then just don't go to any more meetings. I know someone who did this years ago and he is considered weak in the congregation - but congregation members still talk to him and, being a builder, he is still in demand.

  At the end of the day you have to be true to yourself - but if you want to keep family ties open you cannot afford to DA yourself. By all means leave the Org., but NEVER say anything bad about it in front of a JW, including your own family. If you say nothing no one can accuse you of anything other than being weak - and who cares about that!

  By the way, is that your genuine photograph you are using as your avatar? If so, you're probably outed already! JWs come here all the time so if you get recognised they'll report you. Also, beware not to give details of your family name or congregation here as someone will report that, too!

  Keep in touch with the forum and let us know what transpires. We're with you all the way!

  Best wishes,

  Ian
• 

  Sacchiel

  Hello Ian, thanks for clueing me in. Recently an elder approached me and tried to give me some encouragement for going out to field service. I almost came to close to mentioning all these things to him, but was wise not to. I can no longer tolerate comments such as: "God sent an angel to regain the opportunity to live forever" and practically anything regarding the "faithful and discreet slave".

  Its all in God's hands. I am willing to lose my friends and family for Jesus...
• 

  peacefulpete

  I am willing to lose my friends and family for Jesus...

  
  

  
  That's the kind of creepy fanticism that got you into the mess you're facing.
• 

  Sacchiel

  It was creepy because I did not have a foundation for my beliefs. Even the Watchtower contradicts their Bible NWT. Trying to live consistently with scripture was difficult.

  Now I can follow Jesus according to who he said he was. His words are more poignant and meaningful.
• 

  Honesty

  Just write a letter to the BOE and tell them you have been 'stumbled' and no longer want to associate with them. I bet the elder's wives know the details of your letter before their husbands can get their overcoats off in the doorway.

  Nothing like a little bit of gossip going around in the congregation to have them really wondering and asking questions.
• 

  ex-perfectdaughter

  I am fading away as we speak. So far so good. My parents (I'm the only kid) were taking it pretty hard. I just told them I am too busy with school and work. I told Mom I just didn't want to go to meetings anymore. She thinks I'm just going through a phase. I haven't been contacted by the elders yet. I think I'll decline any visits. My dad is an elder if I need encouragement I'll tell them I will go to him if I think I need to. Mom is coming over tomorrow with the new book from the convention, kinda dreading it. This is the first convention I've ever missed in my life.

  So far the fading away is working. I don't think I'll even suggest that I'm having doubts.
• 

  Lady Liberty

  Dear Sacchiel,

  I would tell them Jesus is not there Mediator! Refer them to: Watchtower- 1979 April 1st issue page 31, under qustions from the readers.)

  Questions from Readers

  •

  Is Jesus the "mediator" only for anointed Christians?

  The term "mediator" occurs just six times in the Christian Greek Scriptures and Scripturally is always used regarding a formal covenant.

  Moses was the "mediator" of the Law covenant made between God and the nation of Israel. (Gal. 3:19, 20) Christ, though, is the "mediator of a new covenant" between Jehovah and spiritual Israel, the "Israel of God" that will serve as kings and priests in heaven with Jesus. (Heb. 8:6; 9:15; 12:24; Gal. 6:16) At a time when God was selecting those to be taken into that new covenant, the apostle Paul wrote that Christ was the "one mediator between God and men." (1 Tim. 2:5) Reasonably Paul was here using the word "mediator" in the same way he did the other five times, which occurred before the writing of 1 Timothy 2:5, referring to those then being taken into the new covenant for which Christ is "mediator." So in this strict Biblical sense Jesus is the "mediator" only for anointed Christians.

  The new covenant will terminate with the glorification of the remnant who are today in that covenant mediated by Christ. The "great crowd" of "other sheep" that is forming today is not in that new covenant. However, by their associating with the "little flock" of those yet in that covenant they come under benefits that flow from that new covenant. During the millennium Jesus Christ will be their king, high priest and judge. For more detailed information, see Aid to Bible Understanding, pages 1129 and 1130 under "Mediator"; also God’s "Eternal Purpose" Now Triumphing for Man’s Good, page 160, paragraph 10; also The Watchtower issues of February 15, 1966, pages 105 through 123; November 15, 1972, pages 685 and 686, under the subheading "Leading the Way to a New Covenant"; and April 1, 1973, pages 198 and 199, under the subheading "The New Covenant."

  Sincerely, Lady Liberty
• 

  Swan

  Welcome Sacchiel!
• 

  sass_my_frass

  Hi love. It's a big thing to leave, it's brutally painful at times. Doing it on your own terms gives you more of a feeling of control, but I suggest that you give it a bit more time until you know it's definitely what you want... as in, I know that your faith is taking you other places, but the emotional damage that can happen when all of your people turn their back on you is stunning, and you need to set yourself up so that you'll be able to cope with it when it happens.