What Exactly Is Your Relationship With Your Family Since Leaving The JWs?

by minimus 41 Replies latest jw friends

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    I still have a relationship with my parents (living over 2000 miles away helps), though they aren't happy about my being a christian. I'm close to my brother and sister, they aren't jws.

    Josie

  • elliej
    elliej

    strained, very strained. But even though they have withdrawn their favor, they do still ask me to do lots of favors for them. I'm glad of that!

    Where in the heck do they get off trying to get favors from someone who isn't even good enough to talk to? This could be my husbands family! They shun us, but when they want something they contact us through another relative. "Can you do this for so and so?" Yeah, I'll get right on that. What a fine witness for Jehovah's organization

  • minimus
    minimus

    Fleur, your example is powerful! So sad but so true. I have seen it many times....Ballistic, you're right, you suffer from "disfellowshipping syndrome" and feel all the effects of disfellowshipping without ever having your name announced.

  • blondie
    blondie

    My question, why associate with people who won't talk to you but what you to loan them money, fix their car, do a favor? Why not tell them to SIWTSDS?

    Why associate with people who greet the non-JW relative and ignore the spouse?

    Don't be around these people (that's my motto). Find better people; they are out there folks.

    Blondie

  • minimus
    minimus

    Blondie, why do people stay in abusive relationships?? For the same reason they accept this type of abuse.

  • Satans little helper
    Satans little helper

    I don't have a relationship with my family who are still in the borg, fortunately my brother and sister are now out and coming to Oz to visit later this year.

    My father doesn't want to know, so why should I want to know him?

  • undercover
    undercover

    I was always somewhat the black sheep of the family. But since becoming inactive and not stepping foot into a hall except for the Memorial, I've become even more of the black sheep.

    I get along with most of them okay enough, but slowly and surely I've been shut out of the everyday life of the family. No invites for dinner or parties. No pictures of the children as they grow.

    Part of me is glad to not be included in a lot of those things, because sometimes there is just too much damn drama in my family. For a bunch of supposed Christians there sure is a lot of bickering and fighting. Just leave me out of it, please. But, then when something major happens, no one bothers to inform me or include me, like I'm not worthy enough to visit our dying grandmother in the hospital or something.

  • blondie
    blondie

    When someone comes to me and says their family member socked them in the mouth, I do try to convince them to leave and be safe, offering my home and counseling. If you know it's abuse, you know it hurts, and you ask for help.....

    Don't be part of the abuse cycle; step out of the circle.

    Believe me, min, I know more about abuse (being abused and leaving the abuser) than many on this board.

    If being around your JW family is emotionally painful, stay away until you can deal with it. People who love you will not deliberately hurt you. I know how long that can take to figure out...especially if they hide behind the label of being a member of the only true religion.

    Love, Blondie

  • DannyHaszard
    DannyHaszard

    I am like a Jewish holocaust survivor who has experienced the genocide of his entire clan.My devout pioneer dad married my JW mom in 1956 and now 4 generations of my family are GONE!

  • minimus

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