Anybody know any of those jokes?
Boudreax and Thibodeaux
Well, anyway, here's an e-mail I got this morning:
A man was walking along a California beach and was in deep prayer to the Lord. He said, "Lord, you have promised to give me the desires of my heart. That's what I am asking you for right now. Please give me a confirmation that you will grant my wish." Suddenly the sky clouded up over his head and the Lord in a booming voice spoke to him. "I have searched your heart and determined it to be pure. The last time I issued a blank wish request it was to Solomon. He didn't disappoint me with his request for wisdom. I think I can trust that you won't disappoint me either. Because you have been faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish you ask for." The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm deadly afraid of flying and I get very seasick on boats. Could you build a bridge to Hawaii, so I can drive over there to visit whenever I want?" The Lord laughed and said, "That's impossible! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete...how much steel!!! Your request is very materialistic, a little disappointing. I could do it, but it's hard for me to justify your craving for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honor and glorify Me as well." The man thought about it for a long while and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said, "Here's the deal, Lord. I've been married for many years. My wife always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So I wish that I could understand women...I want to know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment...I want to know why they're crying...I want to know what they really mean when they say 'nothing'...I want to know how to make them truly happy...That's the wish that I want, Lord." then after a few minutes, God said, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
--->[(*_*)]<--- This is me with my fingers in my ears ignoring that punchline! LOL
Sevenofnine.....include me in your group! LOL I've gotten this joke at least twice in my e-mail and was able to ignore....so now it comes to haunt me here.
Ashamed you should be for posting this!! ROFL
RedhorseWoman, Haunt is the exact word I was looking for! The sad part of it all is that we know Frenchy is capable of much better.LOL :)
I loved it...my wife didn't for some reason though.
Women - tuh !
Creation Joke: (based on an actual account, slightly fictionalized for dramatic effect and time compressed to fit into this slot!)
One day Adam was surveying all of the wondrous creations in the Garden of Eden, truly awed and bedazzled at the proliferation and diversity of biological wonders. He looks up and there he sees an angel (actually it's God but Adam thinks it's an angel).
"Well," The angel begins, "What do you think of all of this?"
"This is really swell!" Adam replies. (note: these may not be his exact words but I'm trying to set the mood, okay?) Sheesh!
"But..." Adam interjects before the Angel can reply, "Seems like all of the animals have a mate and it REALLY looks like a very nice arrangement for them. Would it be possible for ME to have a mate? I would want someone equal to me in intellectual ability, someone with deep compassion and intuitive wisdom, someone that would round me out spirtually and intellectually, someone that would compliment me and make me whole. Someone with quiet strength, with serene wisdom, a person who's very power is beauty and charm and wit."
The angel replies without hesitation: "Sure, but it'll cost you."
Adam rubs his chin in quiet contemplation. "Uh...how much?"
"An arm and a leg" Replies the Angel.
Adam rubs his chin contemplatively again and then finally looks up at the angel and says, "Say, what could I get for a rib?"
The rest is history!
----Frenchy is now running for his life!
We all know Eve was the one who was "short-changed" but that's a different joke all together.
LOL. Never heard of Boudreax & Thibodeaux but I'm certain you'll fill us in...lol.
Okay, you asked for it.....
A woman is in the delivery room and her baby has just been born.
The doctor approaches her carefully and says, "Mrs. Brown, I don't know how to tell you this....but your child is a hermaphrodite."
The woman looks shocked, then says, "you mean...you mean...my child has both a penis AND a brain?"
RedhorseWoman, Vengeance is ours! LOL!