by misspeaches 30 Replies latest members private
Mum is seeming very cool and rationale which is such a turn around. Its completely unexpected considering how she has been JW wise all my life. A complete 180. Which has caught me entirely off guard...
Carmel - That is good advice. And I intend on doing just that!! I've meant to tell you this for a long time but you look identical to an elder from my congregation (well the one I am in territory for anyways...!) Everytime I see your pic it gives me a start!
If it was me, I'd just keep quiet, respect her beliefs even though I totally disagree with them and try to show by my actions it is possible to have a happy, fulfilled life away from the jws, something that most of them find very hard to believe.
JWs have to find out for themselves that they don't have the truth, no - one can convince them of that if they are totally devoted to their beliefs.
That is very reasonable behaviour coming from a JW, they usually keep to the extremist approach that other religions and particularly other Christian religions are satanic, as if they themselves are an angelic organisation.
But if she feels comfortable with the JWs then perhaps she should stay with them also considering her age.
Hi P
glad it's working out for you. i left my copy of C.O.C. in an easy to spot place in my bookshelf. My parents came down last weekend and mum picked it up. I said it was a very interesting read and she read the back page and flicked through it. She said she know's the society has faults but that so did king david, and it's better than the alternatives.
I didn't push it, sometimes the door slams shut if you push it too hard. just keep planting seeds.
Best wishes
D
Mum is seeming very cool and rationale which is such a turn around. Its completely unexpected considering how she has been JW wise all my life. A complete 180. Which has caught me entirely off guard...
MissPeaches, perhaps your Mum didn't feel it wise to relax her attitude in front of family members until now that she knows you've taken steps outside the WTS venue. She may feel that she can only relax her attitude in front of those outside the jurisdiction of the WTS. Just play it nice and easy till she lets you know just how relaxed she's willing to be with her thinking and speaking.
Frannie
If she doesnt, I wouldn't push it either.
It's hard after you have seen the exposure of the WTS for what it really is to remember who you may at one time defended it. Years ago people could talk to me until they were blue in the face and it wouldn't matter. I could rationalize everything that came up in my head or what people would tell me (well, enough to keep me going to meetings). I had "worldly" acquaintences try to rationalize the blood issue but that didnt do it; other factors didn't but an accumulating of a lot of stuff plus the fact that I wasted the best years of my youth mentally trapped in this belief system.
You mother may have to come to a personal crossroad before she can see anything.
I think you got a good mum that doesn't cause you problems and grief.
Should the right opportunity come around for you to show her the way and you feel right...take it.
Thanks for all your observations, thoughts and support guys! Its frustrating but I don't think I will push the issue. Just let things happen.
Peaches...
I suggest just letting it alone. I'm in a simular position ( though I'm not attending another church) my parents have respected my decision to leave the organization and are over couseling me about it. They have accepted it and we get along great. I, in turn, will respect their decision to stay in the org if they desire. Yes, this means biting my tongue many times, but I'm sure they are doing the same.
If you are looking for a continuous relationship with your mom, I would try your best to keep things light regarding the whole religious subject. She may be ready someday to hear more about your opinion on the matter, until then just dwell on the things you DO agree on, no doubt you both have a love for God. ( same with me and my parents). Remind her, that is the most important.
I wish you the best...
What about trying to manipulate situations that prompt her to ask questions that I can discuss with her...?
The key word you used in that sentence is "manipulate". I don't think your mom would appreciate it if you "manipulated" her, just like you wouldn't like it if she "manipulated" you into going back to the JWs.
Your best "sermon" will be leading a good life and being happy. JWs can't compute that - it doesn't make sense to them - and it will prompt them to ask you sincere questions, not ones that you've manipulated them to ask.
Just my 2ยข worth.
