by misspeaches 30 Replies latest members private
Hi Peaches,
Your mom may be more liberal and open-minded than you realize. Maybe she's just hanging on because of friends, family, but has emotionally distanced herself from certain teachings, where she can so that she doesn't call attention to herself in the cong.
In any case, have patience with the situation, and answer her questions and give her a 'witness' on the good things the church does, without getting into doctrine. Try to find common ground where you can.
That's amazing that she said she will respect your beliefs. I think the others had great suggestions for you so I'm just here to provide support I guess.
Dams
JT - your right... I guess I just needed to hear that it was the right course of action.
I hate that religon. It makes everything so awkward...
So does this mean I show her the same respect back and just let her be with her beliefs. Not try to disprove the witnesses and show them the zillions of things that have been covered up and lied about? I mean she is extremely devoted to them. Her life is centered on Jehovah.For so long I've been wanting to open her eyes to the JW's because of how many times I've seen her personally hurt by their lack of love. But do I just let it go?
Yes, MissPeaches. As long as she's obviously willing to allow for your differences where religion are concerned. Since she's personally been hurt by their lack of love, she may not be as die-hard as she appears to be. Also, she may be suspicious of the coverups without having let on that she's aware.
I'd let it go for now. See how things continue to go with her. Just simply be happy with where you are right now in life and let it be obvious. She'll be able to tell a lot about life outside the "walls" that are supposed to restrict her thinking, speech and actions just from seeing how you're affected by your change.
Frannie
I think it is amazing how your mom is reacting. She is a very liberal jws. I agree with others, sort of let it simmer a bit, but slowing start talking to her, when the time is right. perhaps she might want to know why you left, ie doctrine issures, etc.
just curious, what religion or church etc did you decide to attend, and why? I'm asking b/c i'm looking myself.
I disrespect the Witness people and I leave them be . . . unless they mess with me or my family or someone important to me.
The fact that she respects your religious choice and doesn't shun you or tell the elders, means that she isn't 100% sure of her religion even though she seems very devout. Or is it that she is afraid of losing contact with you, that she is ready to accept anything?
I think it's a good idea not to push too hard, since your mom isn't pushing you . . . yet. I would not be secretive about the joyful aspects of your new churchlife, but I wouldn't seek to "rub salt in the wound," either by initiating a lot of doctrinal discussions. Surely she will ask you something eventually. It seems like you have a good situation for now and opportunities may present themselves. Good luck with it.
I'm a little envious that your mom seems to be so cool and rational, unlike anyone in my immediate JW family, (although my grandma lets me come visit her and claims not to believe in the disfellowshipping nonsense, at least when her non-jw kids (my aunts & uncle) come to visit & make a little stink about it). It's "all or nothing," black and white, with the rest of them, though. Oh well. There's a chink in every JW family's armor, huh? Maybe your mom is it, the way my grandmom seems to be (Smiley). Hugs. I know it's hard, even in the best of JW family situations.
misspeaches, I've always beleived that the best way to "teach" is to live the life! The gospel at its best!
carmel
This is what I don't understand. You have moved on, good for you. There really is no organization that doesn't have teachings that we question. The problem is that the JW's won't let you question and if you do, you risk being DF'd. The people of the Org. have given the POWER to the Org. I will stay as long as I can play by my own rules. I am inactive, I go to the meetings I wish and I will not allow others to guilt me into anthing that I am not comfortable with. I serve God, I study anything that interests me, I question, it is my way and for the time being, it is with this organiztion that I was raised in. It is possible that I will one day be marked or DF'd. I will deal with that when and if it comes. I think it is the people that give power to the Org. I hope to one day see this change. I may be idealistic. I really don't know where else to go, I just know that I will worship MY WAY! I hope you allow your mother to do the same. The fact that she respects your decisions gives you reason to respect hers!
