Dear friends and fellow sojourners,
As I posted sometime back, I have been grappling with my last fear from the WTBTS--that is, saying good-bye to my mother and brother who are still in the organization by revealing that not only have I left but am now what they consider an apostate. It has come to me, that I must do this to be finally free of the last vestiges of "hold" that the organization still has on me. And freedom, my friends, I treasure more than anything this realm has to offer me.
So, I've set an auspicious date to send the following letter to my brother (decided on a letter vs. a phone call, as I am far more gifted with written word than verbal, I think--and I wish even yet, as the protective big sister to spare him as much embarassment as possible). And to my brother only because he will share with my mother and spare her as well.
To my Dear Brother ****,
I am writing you this to share information with you as well as to say goodbye because I know after I share the information, it will be in your heart and mind, goodbye.
As you know, I am no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses but there is more. I am now what you consider apostate. I speak out regularly and publically about what I consider to be my truths regarding the organization via an internet discussion board. I openly disavow the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society and Jehovah's Witnesses. I actively encourage those interested in this path to examine it closely and honestly thereby encouraging them not to pursue it.
****, know that I love you. Always, you remain in my heart, the precious baby boy they brought home from the hospital. Mother has a poem that I wrote to you on your arrival. I was so excited. I miss you terribly. I long to hear your loud belly laughs, and our ongoing jokes about....EVERYTHING (I wanna go live with the gorillas....Shut up, I'm hungry!!!....He's dead, Jim....so many). Somewhere, in my mind, I still hear that laugh when I hear something stupid or funny. I still think I see you sometimes when the light is right, hunkered over the computer enthralled with some new online game or romance.
May life treat you with utmost kindness. May your brilliance lead you to wealth. May you, your children and wife be blessed.
Please do not ever hesitate to send me word that you need anything---all that I have is yours.
Please tell mother that I love her too. I am grateful for all that she taught me. Let her know that I forgive where or if forgiveness is needed and I understand more than she can possibly know why she raised me the way she did.
Please know that I love you--forever you live in my heart.
I wish for you all the things that I wish for myself,
Love your sister,