Why do all the rest of my fellow UBMs out there stand by their JWs?? Why put up with the hassle??
I do it because I am married with children. If I left my wife, some jag-off jw would be banging my wife, living in my house, driving my car, and raising my kids.
I do feel a sense of duty to my wife. She is in a self-imposed prison of sorts. The closest analogy I can think of is an abusive spouse. I have a responsibility to help her obtain a different perspective, one that allows her to see the possibility of freedom if she is able to choose it.
The question is how much more of my life do I commit to that effort? At some point, don't we have to accept a person wanting to drown, and not let them pull us down with them? I often picture myself hopping on a brand new Harley as I walk out of my kids graduation, leaving my wife behind in a befuddled cloud of dust. I often think of reducing my contribution to our marriage to mere requirements and duties, devoid of any affection and intimacy. In any romantic relationship I think we should never give more than we receive.
How much more of your life are you going to pour out Becka? Don't get me wrong, I think you have an opportunity to help this fella. The fact that he is willing to defy "mother" is a promising sign. But is this really healthy for you?
A very common pitfall for the single, young person (and one of Ben Stein's "Ways to ruin your life") is to run around "dating people with a lot of personal problems, and then thinking you can change them by nagging". I just want you to be honest about your motivations.
Wouldn't it be an incredible validation of your womanly powers, and your remarkeable mind if you were able to help a person such as your boyfriend? How much will you sacrifice to acheive such validation? If you seek such validation, why? Could it be that you simply have an unmet need that could be better fulfilled in a less life-consuming venture?
Sorry. Asking annoying questions is a ubm speciality. But I love you, and that means I want what is in your best interests. If this isn't in your best interests, I don't want it for you.