Do JW's elders really want to know what kind of "sexual activities" you did

by booker-t 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • booker-t
    booker-t

    I know many ex-JW elders out there have the first hand knowlege of this but I was wondering do the elders really want to know everything you did when you were engage in sexual activity that got you in front of a Judicial Committee when you were a JW or now. I have heard horror stories of the elders wanting to know did the person have an "orgasim" did they perform "oral sex" did they perform "anal sex" etc; I can't believe that a person could be so "nosy" as to want to know what a person did in the bedroom. I know a girl who is now DF that I work with and she said that one of the elders asked her what size penis did her boyfriend have and did she prefer "small" or large penises. I told her she was lying but she insisted that this elder asked her that in her committee meeting. She also told me that this elder had been flirting with her for years. Now I am confused so ex-jw elders or present jw elders out there do JW's elders really want to know "everything" a jw did in the bedroom? When I was put on private reproof many years ago they just want to know if the girl I dated was a jw or not. And since she was not a jw they decided to "privately" reprove me because no one knew this girl and the cong could stay clean. They told me if the girl had been a jw they would have "Publically" reprooved both of us to keep the cong clean.

  • justsomedude
    justsomedude

    I never got questions that detailed when I had to go through such things, but a friend of mine did.

    I would have told them to drop dead.

  • carla
    carla

    I've seen quite a few posts about the 'elder porn'. You might check some of the story boards on other forums as well, or some of the sexual abuse cases in which the elders asked those same kinds of questions.

  • Gregor
    Gregor

    Don't blame the elders for all of this. Several years ago the society redefined what was fornication or grounds for divorce, 'pornea'. This opened a real can of worms for the local elders.

    Before this only sexual penetration between a male and female was ground for divorce. But "new light" expanded it to include:

    Sexual activity between the same sex (homosexuality). Even this had to involve actual genital manipulation, not just kissing and hugging.

    Sexual contact between a male and female that resulted in an orgasm. Of course, in practice, only a male has an obvious orgasm.

    A case I was involved in on the JC required me to ask Sister X (of my cong.) if Brother Z (of a neighboring cong.) had an orgasm. They had not had regular sex but she did handle his johnson. She replied, "I think so because my hand was wet when we finished making out". This was now a critical point because it could give their respective spouses the option for a 'scriptural divorce' if they wanted it. I called the elder in the other cong. who was on the JC dealing with Brother Z and told him what I had been told. His wife, Sister Z, wanted to divorce him but only if it was a 'scriptural' divorce.

    They questioned Bro.Z about the wet hand. Did he have an orgasm? He told them, no. When told what Sis. X had said he told them that when he was aroused he leaked fluid but it was not an orgasm.

    This meant that neither innocent spouse could scipturally divorce their mate!

    However, just from what I've read here, it is obvious that some elders are getting their jollys by asking for the juicy details beyond what is needed to satisfy the WTS definitions. They are creeps.

  • minimus
    minimus

    Gregor is correct. The Society was the one thru the elder schools that told us to ask these types of questions. Many elders religiously and zealously obeyed "Mother" on this one. I always tried to not get into the nitty gritty. However the other 2 , I couldn't say the same for.

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo

    They questioned Bro.Z about the wet hand. Did he have an orgasm? He told them, no. When told what Sis. X had said he told them that when he was aroused he leaked fluid but it was not an orgasm.

    well that has changed anyway....now just manipulation of sexual organs is all that constitutes pornea...

    i never asked these kind of questions...in fact i told those involved that none of the elders on the commitee would ask. we didnt want to know what went on , just how they felt about it.

    probably spoiled the other elders fun...bygones

  • divejunkie
    divejunkie

    In my experience they did. They wanted to know how many times, positions, different activities, etc.
    I refused to give details by saying "I had sex. I'm telling you - I'm confessing. The details don't matter - it happened." After that they kind of backed off, but they can be very rude and nosy. I guess it depends on the elders.

  • LDH
    LDH
    His wife, Sister Z, wanted to divorce him but only if it was a 'scriptural' divorce.

    They questioned Bro.Z about the wet hand. Did he have an orgasm? He told them, no. When told what Sis. X had said he told them that when he was aroused he leaked fluid but it was not an orgasm.

    This meant that neither innocent spouse could scipturally divorce their mate!

    I don't know why but this made me bust out laughing. Over a wet hand.

  • kittyeatzjdubs
    kittyeatzjdubs

    i dunno......

    every jc i ever met with wanted DETAILS...

    at one jc i happened to glance over at an elder and he was rubbing his crotch!!!!

    i swear!!!! this image haunts my mind to this day!!!

    luv, jojo

  • kittyeatzjdubs
    kittyeatzjdubs
    I always tried to not get into the nitty gritty.

    good for you mini!!!!!

    luv, jojoof the likes to keep it to a minimum class

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