Imagining that everyone was wearing overalls
What Went Thru Your Mind While Sitting at The Meetings?
when i was a young kid, i was constantly drawing in the books and mags
after puberty all i ever thought about at meetings was sex.
I would sit there and think ( if it was during basketball season) "wonder if the Lakers are winning" followed by "Derek Fisher is hot" followed by "ewwwww thats an ugly tie" followed by "what should I eat when I get home? followed by "Derek Fisher is hot".
That was pretty much it.
Mostly what I want to watch when I get home. I get up and go to the bathroom, go into a stall and pretend I am taking a crap but I am really sitting on the toilet with the seat down playing tetris on my cell phone. My kids are too old to use as excuses now so I usually have to sit and endure the entire thing..
When I was at the hieght of my JW-ness, it was: "what a good point, I'm not doing enough for Jehovah, I sure have to work on this and do better, I'm never doing enough, have to do more, I'm not a good enough Christian and if I don't shape up I'm going to be pecked on by birds after armegeddon."
Towards the end of my career as a JW, it was more like, "what am I doing here, I don't belong here anymore, something's not right, get me the hell out of the place, besides the gold and blue color scheme needs a major redux."
Many, many Sunday mornings: "Oh God, I'm still drunk. Focus your eyes. Focus, dammit! Alright, time to wander through the parking lot and get some fresh air."
Monday night (bookstudy at my house): "Get the hell out of here. I want to play video games. Screw this." *Goes downstairs to play video games for a few minutes*
Wednesday night: "How can anyone take this crap seriously? OK, who wins points for shortest skirt tonight..."
That would have been pretty freaky, slugga!!
What do I think of during the meetings? Hmmmm.. I think my favourite habit was to think of a very very yummy dish I'd like to try again... imagine the aromas, the texture, try to work out the ingredients and then the steps it would take to cook it up. What can I say, I love good food! Pretty unusual huh?
Oh and sometimes, I'd print a crossword puzzle off the web that can fit in my notebook in case the public talk (or the speaker) is notoriously juvenile.
But know what I'd like to see? I'd like to see anyone who's got balls enough to pull out a centrespread of a nude babe/stud during a talk. Man, that would sooo make my day! I'd pay the guy good money for pulling off a stunt like that!
Sunday mornings......I remember giving a Public Talk sooooo hung over! i left right after the talk.
Well first this
Look around to which hotties are sitting where ( most important to have a seat with a good view )
Take off shoes as soon as opening prayer is over, v.good day if managed to get to meeting without being inspected for pantyhose and slip , haha I win again!
See how long I could hold a mute conversation with various cousins, make sure sister doesn't see so I don't get ratted out to mom and dad.
Concentrate on the perfect timing for putting my hand up to answer ( must be early enough so others think you want to comment, but late enough that someone else is ahead of you )
How much longer is this going to be?
Sing various nasty ditties in my head
Look at cute boys and practice making them look back without saying a word. V. good meeting if successful eye contact.
Sigh about how it's too bad their daddy is an elder.
How much longer!?
The last few years, I'd comment to myself about all the bullshit that I couldn't stand anymore.