Hard to deal with

by Coheedandcambria 33 Replies latest jw friends

  • Coheedandcambria

    Im a young Jehovahs Witness, baptized at 8 years old, and now I regret the decision. I miss my sister so bad, shes been disfellowshipped for 3 or 4 years now, and I still talk to her sometimes over email and online, but its not the same as talking in real life. I get random crying episodes, like last night at meeting. I was sitting with my brother and sister in law and niece and nephew, and I just started bawling, and couldnt stop crying until i got home and went to sleep. It was terrible. I try talking to my parents about it, and I can feel that they are hurt too, but they never offer any solution to it. I just miss my sister. I dont have any really great friends that I can talk to about anything and they'll understand, even though i have some good friends, they either arent mature enough or are too self centered. I dont know what to do.

  • Legolas

    Talk to your sister!

    I bet she misses you just as much as you miss her!

    The whole shunning thing is HEARTLESS and UNLOVING!

  • Coheedandcambria

    Its hard. She lives in a city maybe... 45 miles away or more. And I just turned 16. Phone calls dont really do anything, and Im too scared to go against my parents. My dad is pretty cool, but he is an elder, and very active in the congregation. He is against me even emailing her. I dont know how I can go and see her.

  • Finally-Free

    Welcome to the board!

    Baptised at 8 years old? My ex wanted to get baptized when she was 13 and the elders told her she was too young and made her wait another 2 years. There is no way an 8 year old child can decide with any certainty what they will do for the rest of their lives. Many adults can't!

    I've always held the opinion that minors should not be baptised.

    Please stay in touch with your sister. Maybe you can arrange to meet up for lunch with her and see her in person!


  • lucifer

    welcome to the board, like mom said talk to her, if your family feels the loss the should understand that family should come before anything else, including the "Lie"

  • 95stormfront
    Im a young Jehovahs Witness, baptized at 8 years old, and now I regret the decision.

    But, I'll bet they made you feel like a real grown up for making the decision you did at the time didn't they? I'm wondering, just how old are you now? what you're going through is THE reason why I made damn sure my kids didn't get baptised into this cult before they were of age.

  • AlmostAtheist

    Wow, I so feel your pain in your post. You and your sister deserve much better than this.

    Would god really build "humanity" into you, that tells you that it is wrong to shun your sister, then turn around and make up a rule that says you mustn't talk to her? On its face, the idea is silly. Of course he wouldn't.

    Talk to your sister. The elders won't like it if they find out (who's going to tell them?), but they aren't going to disfellowship you for it. Their elders manual (the secret book they use during judicial hearings) says that they would generally not disfellowship close family members for talking to DF'd ones. It's left a bit open, of course, since the heart of any Watchtower rule is wishy-washy ambiguity. But you're pretty safe.

    Welcome to the forum, I hope you can find some comfort here. Why not invite your sister to join, as well?


  • Legolas

    I know it must be hard for you, and I am probably not the best one to give you advice..LOL because I am a straight forward type of person and if you knew what all of us here knew about the TOTAL LIES of the watchtower you would see just how WRONG the whole thing is and how they break families apart!

    Stick around you will learn much and get plenty of excellent advice from those who went through and are still going through what you are.

  • Coheedandcambria

    Im just turned 16 now.

    I dont know if i still want to be one. Im scared, and so lonely. Depression eats at me every day. I have suicidal thoughts, and the only reason why I can think of is that I cant talk to my sister. She was everything to me. And i dont know. I love my brother too. Hes cool. But hes so... like... a typical older brother. Protective over everything, even stupid stuff.

  • Legolas

    Cohee...Do you have a councilor at school that you can talk to?

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