you've ever been disappointed to realize you've run out of DF'able offenses you haven't tried yet.
Im seriously working on that list Dave. LOL
You know you're an apostate when...
by MsMcDucket 42 Replies latest social humour
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IP_SEC
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GetBusyLiving
Your biggest fantasy is to have your girlfriend wear an "Atheist" t-shirt while having sex.
You love celebrating birthday's but turn beat red while singing the birthday song.
You are able to have one or two beers and then stop drinking.
You are happy.
GBL
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IMustBreakAway
You wash your face and hands, brush your teeth and chew gum before meetings and before coming home so that no one knows that you smoked today.
You suck on your papercut.
You suprise your wife by waking her with oral sex.
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xjwms
no guilt
when you have no guilt and feel good.
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FreeWilly
You look forward to JW's knocking on your door...
When you have a whole new catagory of spoof names: Jojooba, Jee-ho--ver, Dubs, Hoba-dubs, Duds, King-dumb hall, da toof.
When you can distinguish JW's from Mormons at 65 mph.
When you've thought about "acting interested" so that cute pioneer chick has a study with you ;)
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TopHat
You start visiting historical churhes on your annual holiday.
How did you know...My desire is to visit historical churches, Mark? I love old churches. Now I don't have to be afraid the devil is gonna get me if I go into one.
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stillajwexelder
when you go to a conevention and get home and go down on your wife/girlfriend/mistress/secretary
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Mastodon
... you don't wake up on a Tuesday or Thursday wishing to have car crash so you have an excuse to miss the meetings.
... you don't have to wake up on a Saturday or Sunday until you are goddamned good and ready.
... the only 'book study' that goes on in your house, happens when you're checking the yellow pages for a kick-ass take out place.
... you pass in front of the Kingdumb Fall and feel the urge to jump into the opposite lane, just to get some distance.
... you are looking for a way to hook up a motion sensor to your garden sprinklers, and a time it for Saturdays only.
... you wonder how a disgusting word like 'Watchtower' made it's way into such a cool song by Jimmi Hendrix.