Hi- New here.

by sassafras 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • AlmostAtheist


    Since he isn't knee-deep in the religion and just happens to believe they're right, maybe discussing it with him wouldn't make him explode. (Talking to a true-blue JW usually isn't productive) It sounds like you've already had discussions, though. Have you ever gotten him to discuss a doctrine with you all the way through?

    They are definitely trained to shift around and avoid getting pegged down. When one argument starts to look weak, they move on to another one, all the while believing they still have the weak one as a "point". It's maddening!

    When I tried it with my father-in-law (a "ministerial servant" -- like a deacon) I thought we could calmly go over the subject of birthdays. That discussion resulted in a document describing why the Watchtower forbids them, and why their arguments for it aren't sound. (You can read it at http://thebentinel.com/jw-birthdays.html)

    I went through them with him, point by point. I kept him on one argument at a time, and discussed each one to the point where he had to concede that the argument was undefendable. We did this through all of them, maybe 8 separate lines of reasoning. He couldn't support ANY of their arguments, but in the end he still maintained that all of the arguments "taken as a whole" prove the point.

    How do you argue with that? :-(

    Lot's of good stuff on this site. I hope you're able to free him from the guilt, that's some nasty stuff. And so unnecessary!

    Have you and/or he read Crisis of Conscience? It's written by Ray Franz, a former Governing Body member (the top brass of the Watchtower) and it is major eye-opener.


  • mouthy

    Welcome sassafras Glad you could join us

  • Van Gogh
    Van Gogh

    Welcome sassefras, You've come to the right place.

    Point your mouse at the post title and click on "edit" in order to change your post and format. I think you then have to check both boxes at the bottem of the message input window (or something like that).

    IMHO, the trick with jdubs like your HB is to make clear that the faithful & discreet slave or GB is a false concept of which jdubs are captives. History research can be very revealing here. It was to me after 35 years. Did you know that a connection was once made between inch-measurements of a pyramid and 1914 (Studies in the Scriptures)? There is a direct relation between 1914 and 1919, which date is crucial to the special position of the GB. The myth of 607 BCE in relation to 1914 is also very compelling.

    (Edit to say: I think the second comment of cheezy's message is very important)

  • sassafras

    Wow! Thanks guys, for the warm welcome. I was (for some weird reason) nervous about posting, maybe because I was never a JW myself, but you all have made me feel right at home. Thank you.

    Cheezy, your comment made me cry. You are so incredibly right on target. Thanks for putting into words what I have felt for so long.

    Okay, off to study the "best of" section. I'm gearing up for a "Big Talk" tonight after munchkin is in bed.

    Thanks again

  • GoingGoingGone

    Hi sassafras!

    I'm also married to a JW, my husband is an elder and I was a JW almost my whole life. I stopped attending meetings about a year and a half ago, but I was mentally out long before that. The longer you're in, though, the harder it is to leave. The sooner you can get your hubby out, the better for both of you, and especially for your son.

    I'm so glad to be out, but now my focus is on getting my husband to see the WT for the lying organization that it is, and to keep my teenage kids from becoming JWs. This site has been so helpful to me, the best of section is great, and the support of the people here has been invaluable at times.

    Enjoy your stay! PM me if you need to talk!


  • serendipity

    Hi sassafrass, welcome to the forum!

  • Aiesha Harley
    Aiesha Harley

    Welcome sassafras, newbie here myself. I've already read so many great bits of advice and understanding from people who have left 'The Truth' as I have. We've all experienced the madness in different ways and it all boils down to the same thing from where I stand - the scars run very deep but once you start to open your mind to the possibility of 'what if they're wrong' and start wanting to listen to what other people outside the religion have to say you realise that you've been blinded all these years by people who, although obviously want what's best for you, have been sadly misguided themselves.

    I used to hear brothers and sisters rattle on about how we're free compared to all the witnesses in the communist countries who aren't free to witness, but they don't understand the concept of freedom - we may have been freer than those mentioned, but we were still trapped in our own little WTS bubble and weren't allowed to explore. No wonder we leave the religion so lost and vulnerable.

    It's a huge step to take and I can fully sympathise with your husband, but be careful, if you push too hard it may turn him the other way and the last thing you need is a visit from the elders drawing him further in.

    Once he realises that there are thousands of people that have been in his situation here and ready to give him all the support he needs it might make him feel a bit more secure about telling the WTS where to go.

  • Legolas


  • lola28

    Welcome Sas,

    Every one here is really nice (((((shhhhhhhhhhhhhh, don't tell them I said that))))))


  • SixofNine

    "well, look at the Catholic church though..."

    lol, the last refuge of the lazy assed scoundrel Jehovah's Witness. I believe in debating terms that is called a "red herring".

    Welcome to the forum.

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