acuragirl, I think meds can help a lot in the short term. I wonder if your therapist is right for you. You've been gone from the witnesses for a while and you are still not feeling better. Maybe try switching therapists.
messed up from the dubs
acuragirl: Im trying my hardest to stay away from meds, i dont believe they really cure anything.
Well, you are right about that, Paxil won't cure you. However, they can give you the breathing room needed to sort things out for yourself. Just a thought.
Thanks for the link SOUL,i am seeing a pyciatrist,(i know i didnt spell that right) the end of the month we will see what he says.
My Witness childhood life was one blur of stress. We were discouraged from doing school homework because three nights a week of meetings were more important. We were discouraged from getting education beyond high school, like any university would have taken me with my grade record. We were psychically and verbally abused by abusive parents. We witnessed other children being beaten and worse. We lived with guilt and a gnawing sense of impending doom. Why wouldn't we be neurotic and depressed and anxious from that kind of a life?
Later as adults we were insulted right in our faces and we were expected to not react and show up next week all smiles like it never happened. The Witnesses practice a kind of social mutilation. We try to survive. We develop problems. We turn to alcohol and prescription drugs. We force ourselves back in front of the Witness people so they can begin their next round of assaults on us, all in the name of God. When we can't stand it anymore, we are shunned by them.
It sounds like we have alot in common.My sons 9th Birthday was on Saturday, and I tried my hardest not to breakdown.I went all day and then it was to much I went into the gerage to kick the heavy bag around.I try my Hardest to give my kids a life that was robbed from me.After 15 years of therapy,pills,prayer and everything thing else you can think of I still have issues,especially around the Hollidays.I found this forum just yesterday and I can honestllly say it makes me feal better knowing I'm not alone.I love my family more than life, but hey don't understand like some of you people do.
Aloha thesethreewords. Glad you landed here. It is a good place to sort stuff out and be heard. I came here almost 2 years and would say reading through these posts and just knowing that I was not alone in my thoughts was a great comfort to me.
Acuragirl...I do believe that part of the problem is that many adult mentally and emotionally disturbed people are attracted to the JWs. I was at a weak point in my life when I was at first contacted by them suffering from post-partum depression. Their little mantra to me then was "You do want your baby to live don't you?" (in otherwords not to die at Armegedon) Of course I did and being paranoid from the depression really fed those thoughts.
The WT has for years discouraged those with real problems from seeking proffesssional (worldly help).. the elders themselves play their 2-bit psycologist roles blaming a persons mental anquish on everything from not going out in service or studying enough to demon attack. I heard of one woman who was having mental problems and the elders went to her house and burned all her stuff up thinking some of her possesions were causing demon attacks. In the last congo I was in there was a sister who was always seeing things (classic schizophrenic symtoms) but she and the congo all blamed it on the demons.
I am sorry that you are suffering from anxiety. Some people are more prone to it than others, but Wt conditioning can make even the calmest person feel anxious after a while. You can condition yourself to be less anxious by practicing breathing tecniques. Many therapists will help you with a program such as this--biofeedback is another avenue. I was greatly helped by a psycologist in this way. Hope things start to feel easier for you. Keep working on it. It takes time, but you can heal.
All my female JW relatives are taking anti-anxiety meds or anti-depressants. We slackers - Mom, my sister and I, aren't.
The WT promotes paranoid delusional thinking and this creates a lot of anxiety in its followers.
This is entirely true.....but only the tip of the iceberg. Not only are JWs subject to the demands of this WTS thinking, they also have to deal with the control in their lives, all the do nots and cannots peculiar to the organization.
With that going on, through constant meetings and studying the same-old same-old every week---week in and week out, the same books being re-studied and MORE boring meetings that they are "thrilled" to be attending.....and the shouts of "do MORE---do MORE" at every turn.....are more than sufficient reasons to be stressed out.
When a friend or relative gets fed up with all that control and rat-race existence...the WTS then demands that the JW no longer speak to or associate with these ones any more. This causes even MORE stress and anxiety while trying to be obedient to the WTS and trying to explain this nonsense to their nonJW friends and relatives. All this does pile up after a while, thus the need for tranqilizers for the burnt-out and stressed-out JWs. (Of course---the WTS representitives will advise the JWs to "do more in field service---and to pray more.....never considering that the demands OF the WTS is what caused their condition in the first place!)
Guess what? THEN when you get older and are no longer "useful" to the WTS...you are forgotten and mentally kicked to the curb after decades of "loyal obedience" to this hateful organization!