My own Brother writes.....

by geevee 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • geevee
    geevee

    Hi all. Just receieved this this morning. Initially I was seething. But now I think that the best reply is NO reply. What do you all think? I know this is another example of head in the sand and no respect for someone elses opinion. Many of you have dealt with this before. Names have been changed for obvious reasons, but the body of the email is how it was sent.
    Thanks.


    hi geevee,
    work is all good, and it does keep me fairly busy. Junior is good and is settling in well. lots of young children to play with.

    without being rude however i am having a hard time with how this is going. i know that you have left the truth, i get pretty upset when i think about the boys not being encouraged to develop a relationship with Jehovah God. to take away from them the chance to live forever i just don't get it.

    i would love for nothing else than to keep in touch with you and the family, and it will always remain my prayer that you as a family decide to give yourselves the chance for life again. and if you do then i offer all the help and support that i can. until then though it seems that what we have in common is reduced alot. how can i talk to you about what is the most important thing in life when you do not share the same faith bacause you have walked away from it.

    if you wish to try to explain what and why then that is up to you. hopefully you will soon see that you have isolated yourself from alot of the things that make life purposeful and start again. i mean no malace in this and it breaks my heart to have to send a message like this to someone that i have always enjoyed a good relationship with, but it needs to be said that without a relationship with Jehovah to bind it all together then how long can it go on. i mean what happens when armaggeddon starts up and you are not in the kingdom.

    what do i tell deceased brother and deceased mother if i get through and all your family does not.

    then again this might just sound stupid to you.

  • jwfacts
    jwfacts

    That made my blood boil. The letter makes you sound like a cold heart person happy to let your children die. Maybe a very short letter would be best, just so it is clear where you stand. Basically saying that you are satisfied that you are doing what is best for the long term welfare of your children, as you now know that being a Jehovah's Witness is not what is required for salvation. If he ever would like to know why you feel that way then one day you would like to discuss it with him (that is if you feel able to have a reasonable discussion with him, which is often difficult with family)

    My sister did similar to me, and i am not even disfellowshipped yet. She rung me twice, abused me over the phone and then hung up on me and has not spoken to me since. It plays over and over in my mind because I just want to let her know what I know and have never been given the chance.

  • geevee
    geevee

    Thanks for the support. I also am not disfellowshipped, or even disasscoiated. Just stopped going. Amazingly enough we actually worked together and he sat there every day and didnt say a word, even though he would have known that we had stopped going. He can be very unreasonable. I will think about composing a letter, but i wont hurry. Family.........

  • katiekitten
    katiekitten
    until then though it seems that what we have in common is reduced alot.

    I guess if he is saying you didnt have a human relationship other than talking about the religion (which is after all only ONE aspect of life), then yes he is right, what you have in common is reduced a lot. It would only hurt you both to try and make it work and keep realising you have nothing in common.

    how can i talk to you about what is the most important thing in life

    at least what is most important in life to him! He could always show some interest in what is important in your life - but then that would mean being big enough to see your important things are different but equally as valid as his important things.

    you will soon see that you have isolated yourself from alot of the things that make life purposeful

    Well, that make life purposeful for HIM. There are things that make life purposeful for you too, its just that they are different. Witnesses have a real hard time understanding that there can be DIFFERENT but EQUALLY VALID things in other peoples lifes. They are like football fans who think - well if you dont love footy you might as well be dead (HELLOOOO - what about hockey, embroidery, singing, etc etc)

    I would be inclined to decline his offer of a sanctimoneous but well meaning moralistic high ground lecture, and explain to him that until he can open his mind to other life choices hes going to struggle to ever underdtand you.

    Best of luck.

  • Ellie
    Ellie

    I can picture someone writing that, I wouldn't be mad if I were you, just quite frustrated and a little sad, maybe you could write a little reply, just saying you are sorry for the way he feels but the decision you have made is right for you and your family.

  • rwagoner
    rwagoner





    It never ceases to amaze me how matter of factly and coldly they can put a publishing company before family...all the while asking you to respect THEIR beliefs, feelings and rules and yet totally discounting yours.

    Your family here still cares...I dont always agree with them all....and hardly ever agree with others LOL But I know that they all care about me and can related to what I am going through and feeling... its a real nice feeling.

  • geevee
    geevee

    Hey thank you all for the support. I wonder how he will feel, when one day it dawns on him that the "promises" he is awaiting [and he will get to be a prince too] are just hot air?

  • twinkletoes
    twinkletoes

    Hello Geevee

    I'm not sure of your reasons for stopping going to the KH, but if like many of us, the UN Scandal was the main issue, then perhaps you could write to your brother and ask him to explain to you why it was OK for the Org to (hypocritically) be affiliated with the UN for almost 10 years, yet at the same time preach differently about the UN? You could ask for answers to some of your questions, saying that you wish to get things clear in your own mind before explaining such things to your own children.

    Twinkletoes

    PS. My brother is still in the JWs, eventhough I sent him copies of the letter from the UN confirming the WT affiliation etc. Sad isn't it.

  • blondie
    blondie

    geevee, pretty sure of his survival and your destruction...not the official company line. I wonder what he will make of this week's WT study on humility?

    Sounds like the Pharisees that were so sure of their righteousness.

    3 scriptures for him:

    (Luke 18:9-14) 9

    But he spoke this illustration also to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and who considered the rest as nothing: 10 "Two men went up into the temple to pray, the one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood and began to pray these things to himself, ‘O God, I thank you I am not as the rest of men, extortioners, unrighteous, adulterers, or even as this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week, I give the tenth of all things I acquire.13 But the tax collector standing at a distance was not willing even to raise his eyes heavenward, but kept beating his breast, saying, ‘O God, be gracious to me a sinner.’ 14 I tell YOU, This man went down to his home proved more righteous than that man; because everyone that exalts himself will be humiliated, but he that humbles himself will be exalted."

    (Matthew 7:1-5) 7

    "Stop judging that YOU may not be judged; 2 for with what judgment YOU are judging, YOU will be judged; and with the measure that YOU are measuring out, they will measure out to YOU. 3 Why, then, do you look at the straw in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the rafter in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Allow me to extract the straw from your eye’; when, look! a rafter is in your own eye? 5 Hypocrite! First extract the rafter from your own eye, and then you will see clearly how to extract the straw from your brother’s eye.

    (Matthew 7:6) "Do not give what is holy to dogs, neither throw YOUR pearls before swine, that they may never trample them under their feet and turn around and rip YOU open.

    Love, Blondie

  • Scully
    Scully

    You could always pretend that you never received it. You know how the Post Office is always losing stuff...

    That letter just goes to show what a coward the average JW is. He can't bring himself to say those things to your face, it will be too hard and he would be taking a chance that you will offer some valid objections that he doesn't have the answers for.

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