Oh geevee how awful to get such a letter, it makes me glad that none of my family ever followed me into the jws. It seems a little arrogant as well, assuming that he will survive whilst you have sentenced yourself and your family to death. I think I would have to think long and hard before replying, I would be so angry at receiving such a letter.
My own Brother writes.....
by geevee 30 Replies latest jw friends
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Mysterious
It never ceases to amaze me how many of these types of letters I have seen, experienced or come across, and they are as to the letter in form as propoganda can be. Overall it is a very cold and manipulative letter, but it is not your loved one doing the manipulating. The organization is reaching through his hand to deliver such poison. I know first hand how much it hurts having experienced it from several close friends and a few of the same lines from family members. However, just remember that what you are doing is truly in your best interests and feel sorry for how easily he is manipulated by such a petty and cruel MAN-MADE organization.
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serendipity
Hi Geevee,
Sorry you have to deal with this. My JW family knows that I have been irregular for a long time and they don't even care enough for me or my daughter to threaten me with destruction. So, at least this shows concern.
I don't know your situation, but if I got a letter like that, this would be my partial response:
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Dear B.,
I know you mean well and I appreciate your concern for my everlasting life. However, I do feel you are treading on dangerous ground. You see, Jehovah has authorized Jesus to do the judging, not humans. I detect a judgmental tone in your letter. It makes me feel that you're trying to shame me or guilt trip into returning. I trust Jesus' judgment of me and if that judgment is negative, and I don't end up being in the new system, then Jehovah will help you and the family cope with the loss. Each member of my family has the same decision to make and Jesus will judge them accordingly.
(I'd probably throw in a few scriptures on a Christian's responsibilities (not the WTS version of that) and on judging.)
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Cocoon
If you chose to respond, here are my suggestions: Whatever you do, show love and concern to him; otherwise, it will validate (in his mind) that he/the Watchtower is right and you/Satan are wrong. I would focus on the wonderful things you have learned since leaving the organization (people aren't as bad as JWs make out and that you have established some wonderful friendships with people who care about YOU, not just what your religious status is; that there is joy in living every day knowing you get to decide for yourself how your life unfolds; that the 1975 etc. dates that have come and gone and how you aren't willing to go from cradle to grave hoping for something that clearly isn't materializing; that your children are no longer the objects of ridicule, oppression and unnecessary limitations and are much happier and emotionally sound; that you want to contribute something to this world to make it a better place and not "wait on Jehovah" because life and living is happening in the here and now--of that we are certain--it's the only thing of which we are certain). Then ask him, "Just what if you are wrong? What will you have sacrificed for the Watchtower?" Let him know that you would rather live a day as you are living today than forever in misery as a Jehovah's Witness. Then tell him you love him and wish he'd be willing to sit down and discuss this with you rather than just "writing you off." Tell him that would be the Christian thing to do. If he still treats you like he is treating you, tell him you can no longer communicate with him until he is willing to meet you half-way because it is too painful for you to see him being so misled. Shunning can go both ways and while it may not be the most desirable thing; sometimes it is necessary to keep your own saniity when dealing with these lunatics.
Brenda Lee, author of "Out of the Cocoon: A Young Woman's Courageous Flight from the Grip of a Religious Cult." www.outofthecocoon.net
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mouthy
Let him know that you would rather live a day as you are living today than forever in misery as a Jehovah's Witness
Yes I think that would be a good answer...We have to do as Jesus said "Forgive them they know not what they are doing"
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Purza
You received a lot of good input. I agree with your first post in not to respond. Here is why I say that. My mother LIVES and THRIVES on battling with me via email. It is so easy to say those kind of things to people when you don't have to look them in the eye. Your brother's letter was very unloving and doesn't even deserve a reply. If you send a response will it start an unending cycle where mean and hurtful things are said? I stopped corresponding with my mother and she has finally got the message that I will no longer continue the cycle/game. I know I could never change her mind about the JWs so I stopped trying. My quality of life has very much improved because of it. Just my .02
Purza
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garybuss
When a Witness tells me I'm going to die at Armageddon, I tell them they will die too because they are bloodguilty. THEY are the reason I'm not a Witness. That usually shuts them up.
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DanTheMan
i mean what happens when armaggeddon starts up and you are not in the kingdom.
Dear brother,
I don't know exactly what you mean by this. Are you stating that since I'm not active in the JW organization that God is going to kill me? A simple unqualified yes or no is all I want.
(not that I really think you should write that, I just think that more dubs need to have their feet held to the fire as to what they *really* believe)
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jeanniebeanz
I am not surprised. A few quotations through the years from my ill, controlled family…
From my sister S to my husband when he invited her into our house to see me, while I was laying in bed recovering from a near fatal delivery:
"Oh, you know I love my sister, but I just cannot see her unless she returns to Jehovah." (she had stopped by to see the baby…) This from a woman who completely turned her back on the religion for no less than 23 years of her life and lived a completely debauched lifestyle. She has since gone all gung-ho self-righteous on the family. lol
From my mother C when I asked why she did not want to have a relationship with her little grandson. "Why would I have a relationship with him when Jehovah is going to destroy him at Armageddon? It may make me not love Jehovah when He kills hiim." Can you say completely inverted reasoning?
From my father E when I asked him how he justified judging me when he had: abandoned no less than two whole families and provided absolutely no support to his seven children from his abandoned wives, stolen another mans wife wrecking a third family, and bitched to me about the brothers and the society my entire life growing up. "silence."
From my mother to my son when they happened to meet in a store in Ukiah by chance. "You dress like that on purpose?" That was literally all this woman said to him. This from a "grandmother" who had not made any attempt to contact her grandson who had not been reproved or found in bad standing with the congregation and with whom there was no reason not to be a decent caring witness grandmother. This was the only time he had seen her or spoken to her in years. He had to tell her who he was…
These were some of the reasons that I just completely cut off contact with them, I won’t have my family expose my children to the same mental illness that I had to grow up with. I tried for close to ten years to reason with them and all they did was talk about witness crap and try to make me feel guilty for seeing it for the crap it is!
What’s funny is that when you turn it around on them, they freak. My mom went all crazy and confronted my daughter at her place of employment and demanded to know why I had ceased returning her phone calls and was not acknowledging her letters. Gee mom, hurts don’t it? Hypocrite.
The bottom line here is that unless you blindly follow their idea of ‘Christianity’ and go to the meetings you are shit. And they have no qualms in treating you as such, whether you are family or not and regardless of the rafters in their own eyes.
J
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Es
The bit that was true in that letter was the sounding stupid bit.
So sorry that you got one of those letters i have had a few too, i recently re read one my folks sent me a while back and it really pissed me off. They act as if you dead, and i love how they say they want to see us in paradise now if a thing exisited who' s to say they are even gona make it anyway?
es