Hi
Just want to know if it is normal practice for the elder giving your wedding talk to ask you and your partner if youve had sex, about 1 week before youre due to get married?
happened to us, and we were f'in shocked!
regards....
Before getting married in a JW hall were you if you have had sex?
by technics1200 27 Replies latest jw experiences
-
-
Latte
Yep...that happened to us!
I was shocked too as the elder giving my talk was a close family friend who i'd know best part of my life. He asked us in a jokey way 'Had we hxd it oxx yet?' LOL
We were told later that they have to ask this as if you say yes - the rules won't allow
-
jwfacts
We were asked that too, think it is a standard question, though it was phrased "Is there any reason that you should not get married in the kingdom hall that we should know about?". I know of a couple of people who must have said yes as the wedding was moved at the last minute from the hall.
Any smart person would wait to confess until after the wedding, saves the hassle of having to find somewhere else to have the ceremony. -
technics1200
the jw's are nosey people.
I just said "no"
Lol. if only they knew.
-
prophecor
Amaxing
-
Gozz
Yeah. There's the couple who said a loud "no", and then she was delivering a baby about 7 months later. Attempts to pass the baby up as premature didn't work. Both were disfellowshipped but quite quickly reinstated. IF you'd do it and would wish to remain in excellent standing, just use protection, and hope your bride or other won't develop a very bad case of bad conscience.
.
-
technics1200
haha lmao
there was one couple who live south of where i am (about 30 miles) and she got engaged and married within 6 months, 5 months later a 8lb-something baby was born! lol.! they didnt get dis-fellowshit for that tho.
every day im so happy im out of that doo doo.
-
tijkmo
i used to do the asking...as i used to take weddings
however its a bit unfair to ask the week before the wedding...so i used to tell the couple when they first came to me..usually about a year before..that i would be asking them (oh and it wasnt just did you have sex..but also was there any 'loose conduct..uncleaness.. .greediness.idolatry going on.[see elders school notes part 6 by sir82] )...so if they had been up to anything then they had better stop or lie when there were asked nearer the time
i wasnt asked when i got married...just as well really...for all my faults im not a liar
-
ICBehindtheCurtain
We were also asked, but I know there must be alot of couples that when asked just said no, and proceded to have their nice little wedding, although they had already endulged.
IC
-
DannyHaszard
This dub 'oral tradition' goes back since forever and the couples lie,if you said yes then you don't use the hall and everybody knows why.
If you went off and lived a life of debauchery,got DFed/reinstated then you could use the hall.So,virginity has got nothing to do with it,it's just another little hook into you to exercise their control over every facet of your life.
How did this affect Danny?I had tons of girls dub & worldly that wanted to screw my eyeballs out that i rejected and ignored and styed a good little sexually repressed JW until i was 46 y.o. waiting on jehover to give me a wife in the new system.